Kaleidoscope
by blaine-ties
Summary: Blaine is starting a new chapter at McKinley, but what he didn't expect was for the resident bad boy, Kurt, to immediately take an interest in him. This is a story of how two people from completely different worlds fall in love.
1. Chapter 1

A/N So this is my very first story and although I'm kind of nervous about posting it I'm also really excited so I hope you enjoy!

_~ Milly-Victoria_

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of it's characters

* * *

Blaine was nervous. Blaine never got nervous though. Well, he'd never had reason to get nervous, not in his eyes. As he stepped out of his car and into the parking lot he looked up at the doors leading into the McKinley corridors. He took a deep breath and sighed before he grabbed his bag out, slung it over his shoulder and started walking. He subconsciously fixed his bowtie like he always did when he was anxious before reaching the school doors. He really hated having to start at a new school, especially a public school, but he knew things could be worse. He reached into his pocket to find the slip of paper he placed there earlier that morning with the number of his locker and the code on it. He reached his locker and looked up only to find Sam there.

"Blaine, finally! I've been waiting here forever man." Sam said as he reached down to hug Blaine. It had been a few months since Sam had moved here from Dalton so they hadn't seen each other much but Blaine was just glad to have someone here that he knew.

"Uh, yeah. There was a long line up at the Lima Bean this morning. Wasn't going to skip out on coffee on today of all days though." He looked up at Sam to see him with a sad smile on his face, knowing all too well what Blaine was going through. Their Dad's both worked at the same hospital, but with the amount of cutbacks they'd been having, Blaine was lucky enough that his Dad had stayed at the hospital for as long as he had. Sam wasn't as lucky.

Unfortunately for Blaine, he didn't have Sam in his first class. Most of his classes were AP classes except for physics which they had together after lunch before they went to glee club for Blaine's audition. Sam showed him his classroom before they parted ways leaving Blaine clueless as to where to sit. Glancing around he could already see other people in the room sitting with their friends leaving only one seat right in the middle, free for him to sit.

Blaine felt more comfortable once class was started. He didn't have to worry about everyone else around him. He could just focus on his teacher and the lecture she was giving them about Atticus Finch's views on good and evil. This part of the day was easy for Blaine. He knew he'd have no trouble with the course work seeing as Dalton's classes are much harder and push their students further there than they do here. He took his homework from his teacher with a smile just as the bell signalled the end of class. He packed his books away and looked up towards the door just as the back of messily coiffed hair turned the corner and out of the room.

Blaine's classes up till lunch had all been the same. He had Sam show him where all his classes were and then was left once again to find a seat among the rest of the students. He just couldn't get the feeling of being watched out of his mind. He guessed he was just being paranoid, still a little fearful of being back at public school again after what had happened at his school before Dalton, but let that slip from his mind as he entered the cafeteria closely following Sam.

They sat with the other few glee kids that had the same lunch period as them and even though Blaine had never met any of them before he immediately felt welcomed by the few that were there. All day he'd been comparing McKinley to Dalton, most of the time not even realising it, but couldn't help but laugh a little at just how different the people from the glee club here were. On his left was an Asian couple, whose names he couldn't remember, who kept making out with each other while across from him was the boy in the wheelchair, Artie, who was being sung to by some girl who really couldn't sing, Sugar. _Was she actually in glee club or does she just not have other friends?_ Blaine knew he'd have to ask Sam about that later. Then off to the right of him and Sam were too girls fighting over who deserved the solo at their next sectionals performance, Mercedes and Rachel if he remembered correctly, while Sam spoke to Finn, Rachel's boyfriend. He couldn't get over how loud they all were and that they kept talking over the top of each other but it seemed that no one minded at all. He had half an idea of filming them interact and sending it to Wes to show him what life outside of the Warblers was like. He quickly thought better of it knowing it would be rude to start filming these people who were practically strangers to him, he also knew that Wes would possibly have a heart attack over all the chaos.

He was looking forward to physics, knowing he actually had someone to sit with in that class. He sat down next to Sam at the back of the room and shortly after Finn arrived with some guy with a Mohawk, _he really needs to get that shaved off, _and next to Mohawk guy was another boy with the same messily coiffed hair from earlier that day. Blaine couldn't stop looking at him, from his chestnut brown hair, eyes whose colour kept changing depending on the light, down to his black, fitted leather jacket, white T-shirt and the skinniest black ripped jeans Blaine had ever seen in his life.

"That's Kurt you're looking at and the other guy is Puck" Sam started whispering in my ear. "If I were you, I'd stop drooling over Kurt, yeah he's gay but he's the biggest player. Not what you want man."

Blaine heard what Sam said but he just couldn't stop looking. Sure Kurt was hot, any guy would be an idiot to think he wasn't, but it wasn't just that. Kurt was _gorgeous_. Finn went and sat on the other side of Sam while Puck sat in front of him and Kurt sat right in front of Blaine. Blaine just continued to stare and before he knew it he was face to face with Kurt.

"Like what you see?" Kurt was smirking at him making Blaine realise he wasn't being as subtle as he thought.

"You're not too bad yourself for some preppy school boy. How about we get to know each other a little better back at my place later on? Or I could just fuck you senseless in the back of your car right now if that's what you'd prefer." That last part was barely even a question, more like a statement, as if he was just thinking out loud.

"Uh w-what?" Blaine could barely believe what he was hearing. He knew what Sam said and saw the way Kurt had the whole _'I don't give a fuck' _ look about him going on but he still didn't expect him to be so blunt.

"I said we could-"

"I know what you said. I'm just not interested thanks." Blaine could almost hear Jeff making fun of him for being '_oh so dapper' _as he and everyone else around Dalton always liked to say.

Before Kurt could even open his mouth again he was being scalded at by their teacher for not facing the front and then class started.

"I told you he wouldn't be you type." Sam pointed out as they made their way to glee practice after physics. They were the first ones in the choir room and sat down at a couple of chairs on the middle step.

"I'm pretty sure hot is anyone's type, Sam. Besides I've never really been with anyone, how do I know if I even have a type?" Sam just stared at Blaine at this and obviously chose to ignore him.

"So how's your first day been so far? I know you were pretty nervous about starting here." Sam had always been such a good friend. He wasn't just asking to help pass the time, he actually cared about what Blaine had to say. He couldn't help but be pretty annoyed at himself at this. He and Sam had been close at Dalton but drifted a lot once Sam left. He knew it was mainly his own fault for not trying harder to keep in touch but knew it wouldn't do well to dwell on it and was just glad he had a close friend back.

"It's been okay I guess, I haven't been beat up yet so I'm taking that as a good sign." He laughed bitterly at this, being taken back to _that night_..

"_Come on Blaine, let's just go" Eric, Blaine's date to the dance, looked down at him with wide fearful eyes. Blaine could tell he was frightened but Blaine was sick of always being scared. He wanted, no _needed_ to stand up for himself._

"_No, Eric. If we just run every time we see bullies in our lives they're going to think they've won! We cannot let these ignorant excuses for human beings think that they've won!" Blaine could see they were getting closer, they also looked a little drunk. He knew this wasn't going to end well but knew he had to fight back._

"_I don't care if you stay Blaine, I'm not going to be some sitting duck. I'm getting out of here!" And just like that Eric had took off, leaving Blaine alone to stand up for what he knew was right._

Sam just looked at Blaine knowing there was nothing funny about what he said and just waited for him to continue on.

"I just feel like I'm always being watched, you know? Like at any moment someone is just going to attack me from out of nowhere and there'll be no one to help stop it." Blaine was always such a confident person but moments like these he felt so weak and hated feeling so helpless. He didn't want anyone else's help but he also had to admit that he was a little scared. Not necessarily scared of someone jumping him but scared knowing that people could make him feel like this. Make him feel like he _needed_ help.

"Look, Blaine. I'm not going to say that everyone here is perfect because I know there are some real homophobic jackasses in this place but no one is going to hurt you. Not since what Kurt and Puck did last year." But before Blaine could ask what happened last year other members of New Directions started rolling into the classroom and Sam had turned to start talking to Puck.

_Huh, I didn't think Puck would be in glee_ Blaine couldn't help but think. He looked around and saw some of the people that he sat with at lunch and also saw some other faces he didn't recognise. That's when the glee club teacher, Mr Schuester, walked into the room announcing to everyone that they had a new member auditioning and invited Blaine to stand up front.

When he had been looking for a song to audition with Sam had helped him out by telling him that it was boys verses girls week but the boys had to do songs traditionally sung by girls and vice versa. This made Blaine's choice easy. He straightened his bowtie but not because he was nervous. No, he definitely wasn't nervous. He was about to perform, how could he ever get nervous when this was the most natural thing for him to be doing. He just wanted to make sure he was looking his best. He sat up from his chair and made his way over to the piano. He'd wanted to do the original version of the song but wanted to try out an acoustic version and there was no time like the present right?

Just as he started to play, the door swung open and revealed Kurt who walked straight over to Puck, sitting down and propping his feet up on the back of the chair in front of him. Blaine was surprised to see Puck was here but was even more surprised to see Kurt in glee club. He didn't know why he should be surprised really but suddenly he felt a small wave of nerves flow through him at the thought of performing. _At the thought of performing in front of Kurt_.

He looked around and saw everyone waiting on him so he began to play.

"_You think I'm pretty without any make-up on  
You think I'm funny when I tell the punch line wrong  
I know you get me, so I let my walls come down, down_

"_Before you met me, I was a wreck  
But things were kinda heavy, you brought me to life  
Now every February you'll be my valentine, valentine"_

He looked up to see Kurt's blue orbs boring into him as he sang. He expected to see the same smirk on his face as before but instead an unreadable expression faced him as he continued on.

"_Let's go all the way tonight__  
__No regrets, just love__  
__We can dance until we die__  
__You and I, we'll be young forever"_

Blaine could feel Kurt's gaze on him still and that feeling of being watched from earlier sweep through him again. He still couldn't understand why he was so nervous but that made him sing with more emotion than he ever thought possible.

"_You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream  
The way you turn me on, I can't sleep  
Let's run away and don't ever look back  
Don't ever look back_

"_My heart stops when you look at me  
Just one touch, now baby I believe  
This is real, so take a chance  
And don't ever look back, don't ever look back"_

Blaine finished the rest of the song and looked up to find everyone applauding him with such excitement on their faces. With a little bow and a glance in Kurt's direction before sitting back next to Sam he couldn't help but keep the grin off of his face. Ashe turned to look straight ahead he came face-to-face with Rachel, a massive grin on her face.

"We haven't been formally introduced yet. I'm Rachel Berry. Co-captain of the New Directions and head soloist for all of our performances. On behalf of everyone here I would like to congratulate you on making it into our little family. It's very hard for me to find people who can keep up with me vocally but I think that you would make a great addition to our back up vocalists and would do very well in making me stand out-"

"Rachel! It's his first practice, don't scare him off yet. Sorry dude, she gets kind of excited." Blaine was so thankful for Finn in this moment. He had seriously considered leaving the room and never looking back if this Rachel girl was always going to be like this.

"Thank you Rachel, for your… welcoming words." He quickly glanced at Finn and mouthed a _thank you_ as he heard Sam whispering in his ear "_oh so dapper." _Yeah. Blaine had missed Sam.


	2. Chapter 2

Blaine arrived home after his first day of school collapsing onto his bed. He didn't move for about fifteen minutes, exhausted from starting at a new school. It was bad enough that he had to move to a new school but he was really most upset about the fact that they had to move all the way to Lima from Columbus. He didn't know anyone here apart from Sam and didn't want to start school by immediately being an outcast.

As he pulled on sweats and one of his old Dalton t-shirts, he couldn't help but smile at how welcoming everyone in the New Directions had been to him. He'd only been there for one day and they already treated him like he was one of them. He was so proud to see that they even had a lesbian couple within the group and that it didn't bother anyone there. He finally started to feel like this move might actually work out.

He heard the front door open downstairs and decided to go tell his Mum about his first day there. Walking into the kitchen he sees his Dad sit down at the counter instead, making him wish he'd just stayed upstairs in his room instead. He didn't turn around quick enough though as his Dad, Anthony, called his name just as he started on the first step.

"Blaine, how was your first day?" His Dad sounded tired. He could only get a few shifts a week at the Lima Hospital and when he did they were really horrible hours which resulted in him always being worn-out whenever he was home and not wanting to spend much time with Blaine and his Mum, Susan. Blaine knew his Dad didn't really care about how his day was but just thought that it was his obligation to ask.

"My first day was fine. Sam was there and I met his friends, they seem to really like me." Blaine started on the stairs again hoping to reach his room before his Dad said anything else to him. He wasn't so lucky.

"Blaine, come down here for a moment. I want to talk to you about something." Blaine knew this wasn't going to be good. He really wished his Mum would walk through the door at any moment, saving him from whatever was about to come.

"What do you wanna talk about Dad? I've got homework to get done." Blaine told his father before sitting down on the other side of the counter on the furthest chair away from him. Anthony was quick to notice but decided not to speak up about it.

"I know you had it rough, son, at your old school because you were gay-"

"I'm still gay Dad, that's not changing." Blaine was so sick of having the same conversation with his father over and over again but decided to let him continue.

"I know, I know. That's what I wanted to talk about. I think it would be a wise idea for you to maybe not tell people about your… preferences. It will make sure that people don't start to bully you again and-"

Blaine was seeing red. He knew his Dad didn't like that Blaine was gay and their relationship was strained because of it but he could not believe that he would go so far as to tell Blaine to pretend to be someone he's not.

"I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU! Do you really think I would _ever_ hide myself from the world? I have always been proud of who I am and I am not going to start hiding away because it would make your life easier, pretending that I'm not gay!" Blaine was yelling at him more than he ever had before. His Dad had finally taken it too far.

"Blaine I just mean-"

"No Dad! I am proud of who I am." He started walking back up the stairs but turned back to his Dad just before he reached the top and in a quiet voice muttered "I wish you would be too" before climbing the rest of the way and slamming his door.

_Well there goes my good mood from earlier_. Blaine had never been so angry at his Dad before. He had at least always felt like that on some level his Dad could still love him. Today just destroyed all hopes he had for them though.

He picked up his phone and called Jeff, knowing that hearing his best friend's voice would make him better instantly.

"Blainey! How was your first day? Were people nice to you? Oh, was Sam there, how is he? Tell him I say hi. Did you meet any boys? I bet they were drooling all over you! Oh I almost forgot, today at Warbler practice me and Nick finally did that prank on Flint we were planning last month-" Blaine couldn't help the chuckle the escaped his mouth at hearing Jeff's excited voice. He quickly shut him up and started telling him about his first day at McKinley.

Blaine knew he was going to miss his blonde friend more than anyone else at Dalton. He was the first friend he made there when he arrived and the two of them have always been there for each other. Even if Jeff wasn't the best with emotional talk he always knew how to cheer Blaine up.

He knew that Jeff could tell that there was something wrong so he did what he knew best. Cheer Blaine up. He knew how to get Blaine's mind off of things so he rambled on about everything that had been happening there since Blaine had left. It was times like these that made Blaine realise how much he depended on his best friend and how much he appreciated everything he's done for him.

* * *

The next day at school Blaine already felt more confident. Once again he met Sam at his locker who walked Blaine to his first class. He sat down in the same seat as he did the day before. As class was about to start but noticed in the back right-hand corner was a sleeping Kurt. _Since when was Kurt in my AP English class? _Blaine figured he must have just found an empty room when he got to school and hadn't woken up yet. There was no way Blaine hadn't noticed him yesterday.

Class started and Kurt's head slowly rose from the table in front of him. Blaine quickly looked away before Kurt noticed him staring, again, and tried pushing thoughts of the boy out of his head. He hadn't been listening to his teacher so was surprised when she called his name.

"Blaine. Since you don't have a partner for the assignment you'll be partnering with Kurt who also wasn't here last week when partners were chosen. Still choosing to smoke under the bleachers instead of attending my Friday classes Hummel?" _Kurt Hummel, _Blaine thought to himself. He'd have to keep a note of that.

"Well you see Ma'am, I always intend on coming to these Friday classes but I get here and see your ugly face and I decide that I shouldn't have to put up with looking at you for a whole period on a Friday when I've been subjected to staring at it all week as it is." Kurt had a massive smirk on his face as he spoke and had started to pack away his books before she even had a chance to yell at him to go to the principal's office. He saluted her and walked out, kicking one of the chairs over as he did so.

As everyone else was still gaping at what Kurt had just said and staring at Miss Hughes to see if she would crumble after the hurtful words, all Blaine could think about was hot Kurt had looked. He was wearing the same fitted white t-shirt from yesterday but instead had on the tightest maroon skinny jeans Blaine had ever seen in his life. He would have sworn they were painted on if it wasn't from where it was creased along his legs. And his ass, Blaine was sure he had never seen an ass as perfect as Kurt's.

Before he knew it the bell was going off, breaking him from his day dreaming of Kurt. _More like fantasising_ he corrected himself. He knew it would be hard to forget those legs and ass that night as he went to bed.

Throughout the rest of his classes, Blaine noticed that he shared three other classes with Kurt, two of them AP and the other being physics. He was unusually quiet in the rest of his classes which disturbed Blaine a little. He was used to Kurt always being so inappropriate towards everyone he came across that it intrigued him to see Kurt so reserved.

During the rest of his classes that day he still felt like he was being watched. It was the same feeling he had all day yesterday and when he was singing in glee club. The same feeling he had when Kurt was watching him. Every now and then he would chance a glance at Kurt just to find him staring back at him, quickly planting a smirk on his face before Blaine looked away again.

They don't ever interact really. Just small glances at each other and every now and then sexual gestures from Kurt. Blaine knew he should be more disgusted by Kurt than he was but couldn't help but be fascinated by the boy whose eyes today sparkled green in the sun.

Physics came by quickly. Once again he didn't talk to Kurt though because he had sauntered in about fifteen minutes late, sitting right in front of Blaine, same as the day before, giving him a perfect view of his ass as he sat down.

"Dude stop staring. I told you he's not the guy you wanna go for." Sam whispered into his ear as the teacher had his back turned. He didn't realise he was being so obvious, heck he wasn't even _meaning_ to stare, he just was, he couldn't help it.

As class ended Blaine got up and followed Sam out the door, heading towards his locker when he felt an hand slide around his waist and a body up against his other side.

"So my offer from yesterday still stands gorgeous and seeing as we're now English partners it looks to me like we'll be fucking in your car _and_ I'll be getting you back to my place afterwards to… _study_." Kurt all but purred out into his ear. Blaine was in still in shock from the feeling of Kurt being right up against his side that he didn't realise they were walking in the opposite direction to his locker.

He looked up at Kurt and noticed for the first time that he was actually a couple of inches shorter than the other boy. Finally being able to have a closer look at his face he noticed for the first time all the piercings through his ears and _was that a tongue ring I just saw?_ They reached a set of lockers and Kurt opened up his own looking at Blaine like he was waiting for an answer.

"Uh yeah, sure. Cool." Blaine really hadn't been paying attention to what Kurt was saying since the comment about doing it in his car but realised at Kurt's raised eyebrow and excited smile slowly spreading across his face that the comment about Kurt fucking him in his car _was_ the last thing he had just said.

"Oh shit, no. I don't mean like, hell no but I just mean yes. Yes to going back to your place to study. And that's all. And when I say study I actually mean study." He couldn't _believe _he had accidently agreed to have Kurt fuck him in his car. Not that he didn't think it wouldn't be amazing but it really wasn't what he was interested in.

Kurt laughed a little before taking out a helmet from his locker. _A helmet, why does he have a helmet? _They made their way over to Blaine's locker with Kurt grabbing for his waist again. This time Blaine was quick enough to dodge the move.

"Well as fun as _just studying_ sounds, I can't do tonight. I actually have a life I like to live. How about tomorrow at that library around the corner after glee? It's a quiet place there and it'll give me all day tomorrow to convince you to give me a blowjob under the desk there. And if you're lucky I might even return the favour."

With that Kurt took off down the hall and stepped outside. Before Blaine could even process what just happened he saw Kurt speeding away on a friggen Harley Davidson. As Blaine grabbed his books from his locker he couldn't help but agree with Sam. Kurt _definitely _wasn't his type.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I first started posting this expecting that no one would even bother to read it but I'm so happy that there are people who are actually reading this and seem to be enjoying it! So here's another chapter for you:)

Word of warning, chapter contains alcohol abuse and homophobic comments.

_Milly-Victoria_

* * *

After parking his bike in the driveway, Kurt opened the door to his house, dumping his bag by the door and heading straight into the kitchen to find food. What he didn't expect to see was another empty whisky bottle sitting next to the sink.

"Dad! Dad you home?" He didn't notice his Dad in the living room when he got home but went to check anyway. When he didn't find him sitting in his usual spot in his recliner he went upstairs to check the bedroom.

Just as he expected, Burt was once again passed out on his bed, holding another one of Kurt's Mum's shirts. Kurt new how much his Dad missed Elizabeth since her death almost two years ago now and he hated seeing him like this. He hated coming home to a drunk Dad who was still grieving over the death of his wife but he also knew there was nothing he could do. It was his own fault after all.

Burt had been doing well lately and Kurt was supposed to go with him to the AA meeting he had tonight but knew he wouldn't be able to sit through that after seeing his Dad like this again. Instead, he went into the kitchen and looked for any other bottles Burt might have bought. After finding and pouring another two bottles of whiskey down the sink, Kurt went straight for the front door, not bothering to leave a note knowing that he'd be back before Burt woke. He jumped onto his bike and started riding.

No matter which direction he started to ride in he would always end up in the same place. He got off his bike and started walking through the trees and up the familiar path. He walked through slowly, taking in how much the place has changed since he was a kid. He walked into the clearing and sat down on one of the two old tree stumps. He looked over at where his Mother used to sit next to him and read the words she wrote there so long ago. '_Climb every mountain, Ford every stream, Follow every rainbow, 'Till you find your dream' _

He was taken back to when he was thirteen and Elizabeth brought him here after he'd admitted to her that he likes boys the way he was meant to like girls. He remembered her writing those words down on the stump and then looking him straight in the eye and telling him to never doubt himself and to never let other people tell him what he could or could not do. She told him to make sure he always followed his dreams because he deserved just as much as anyone else to be as happy as he could be.

How could he be happy though? He killed the most important person in his life, made a drunk out of his Dad most of the people he simply walked by quickened to get passed him. He stood up and looked down at the words he'd written on his own stump a week after she'd died. _'I go to the hills, When my heart is lonely, I know I will hear, What I've heard before.' _He could almost hear Elizabeth singing to him like when he was a little kid when they'd first seen The Sound of Music together. Usually he felt better after sitting here and thinking things through, feeling his Mum sitting to his right, but tonight he couldn't feel her.

This small clearing in the woods was the one peaceful place he had to escape from reality but it seemed that everything kept following him up here, all of the wrong he'd done replacing all of the goodness from his Mum's heart and the innocence from his own.

Suddenly the anger built up again, closing his eyes he tried to will it all away but couldn't and before he knew it he was screaming. Screaming because he missed his Mum, screaming because his Dad would rather trade his own son to get his wife back. Screaming because everything had gotten so fucked up and it was all his fault. He finally stopped and landed on the grass beneath him, waiting for his breathing to calm down and falling asleep right there like he had so many times before.

Kurt arrived at school the next day coming straight from the clearing he'd spent the night in. He ignored everyone that day. People used to ask him what was wrong but they learnt to not ask and to let him have his space. Puck didn't talk to him but kept by his side for most of the day, not wanting Kurt to do something stupid like he normally did.

Kurt didn't bother with glee that day and decided he needed to get his frustrations out. He jumped on his motorbike and rode for about twenty minutes until he reached the place he was looking for. He headed straight for the door and didn't even have to knock till it was opened.

"I heard your motorbike speeding down the street, thought there would only be one reason for that." Kurt heard Mike or… Mick or maybe Mark or whatever his name was say before he barged in without so much as a hello.

"Boyfriend home?"

"Nope."

"Good."

Nothing else was even needed to be said after that before they both started taking off their own clothes and headed upstairs into the bedroom. The other man went to his bedside drawer and picked out a bottle of lube and a condom and threw them on the bed before climbing on top of Kurt. He went in for a kiss but Kurt cocked his head up making whatever his name was kiss down his neck instead.

"You know the rules…"

"Mick, my name is Mick. God Kurt how many times have you been over here and you still don't remember my fucking name?"

His talking was really annoying Kurt. He came over for one reason and that was not it.

"Well it's a bit hard to remember anything with a hot piece of ass like yours on top of me don't you think?" They both knew that was a lie but it was enough to shut Mick up.

Mick continued kissing down Kurt's neck, shoulders, over his chest and down his stomach until he reached Kurt's hardening cock. In one swift movement his took it into his mouth and started sucking. Kurt knew this wasn't the man's strong point and he pulled Mick off him and flipped them over.

"Hands and knees, _Mick_." Kurt practically spat at him while he grabbed the condom, rolling it over himself, slicking up his cock and rubbing the excess lube from his hand against Mick's hole before lining himself up. He didn't bother stretching him anymore. Mick claimed that he was at it with his boyfriend so often that he didn't need it. Kurt was pretty sure he just likes it when it hurts.

He slid in slowly at first but as soon as he bottomed out, he pulled back and suddenly snapped his hips forward again. He didn't bother trying to go slowly at first or anything. He just kept thrusting harder and harder knowing that it would have been hurting like a bitch but not really caring. He could hear Mick moaning and yelling beneath him into the pillow but the noises just annoyed Kurt at most.

It wasn't long after till Kurt was shooting into the condom, falling on top of the other man. After catching his breath he pulled out and took off the condom, tying it and throwing it in the direction of a bin he knew was somewhere in this room. He slapped Mick's ass before getting off the bed and without another word started pulling his clothes back on.

"That's it! Are you fucking kidding me? You fuck me till your satisfied and then leave me here still hard!" Kurt turned and looked at Mick realising that the other man's cock was in fact still straining up against his stomach, aching for release. Kurt smirked at him and turned around heading for the door and yelled back.

"Not my problem. I'm sure if you give your boyfriend a call he'd be happy to help." And with that Kurt was down the stairs and out of the house.

Kurt arrived home that afternoon to find Burt watching the game on T.V, sober. He walked straight past him without a word.

"Where were you last night, Kurt?"

Kurt turned and marched into the living room, turning the T.V off and standing in front of his Dad.

"Where was I? I got home to find you passed out on your bed. Again. We were supposed to go to that meeting together remember? But no, you had to go and get pissed off your face like you always do." Kurt was sick of having the same argument with him but each time he still hoped that it would be the time that Burt would actually listen to him.

"Kurt, I'm sorry. I really am. Next week we'll go together. How does that sound?"

Kurt looked at his Father but didn't yell, instead speaking in a quiet voice.

"Dad, you can't keep doing this. I know you miss her but I do too. When she died I considered myself lucky that I still had you. But then you left me too." And with that Kurt walked out. He went down to his room and collapsed onto his bed. Not bothering to change or shower before falling into another restless sleep.

* * *

Blaine walked into English finding Kurt in the back corner where he always sits. Without even thinking he walked straight up to him and slammed his bag down right next to Kurt's head. Waking to other boy up.

"Where were you, Kurt?"

Kurt just looked at Blaine, still confused as to what he was talking about or why he had to wake him up.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about yesterday after school, I was supposed to meet you at the library. I waited for an hour and you never showed. You were the one who wanted to meet in the first place."

Kurt sighed and sat back in his chair, looking up at Blaine with eyes that didn't look right at him.

"Look, princess, I know how excited you were about giving me that blowjob but there are better things I had to do."

"Better things, like what?"

Blaine looked at Kurt and could see how irritated he was getting and started wondering if this was maybe a bad idea now.

"Things that don't fucking concern you, okay? I know it must be hard for the preppy school boy to be stuck with the smoking, motorbike riding, dropkick but there are worse things that could happen." Kurt didn't even look at Blaine after that. Blaine watched as he got up and left the room just as their teacher walked in. Looking around he noticed everyone staring at him and wondered how long it will be until rumours started going around the school about them now.

* * *

The next two weeks went by without a single word shared between the two boys. They stayed out of the other one's way as much as possible. Blaine spent more time with Sam and getting to know the other New Directions members. He became pretty close with Finn and Puck but things would always get awkward when Kurt was there with them. Everyone noticed it of course but no one said anything.

No one really knew why they had so much tension between them. Even Blaine didn't know really. Yeah he thought Kurt was a bit of a douche sometimes and after their little argument in English thought that things would be awkward for a little bit but he seriously thought that would be forgotten by now.

The ignored each other for as long as they could until they only had three days to get their assignment done.

"Kurt!" Blaine found the other boy at his locker that morning, looking a little skittish when his name had been called out. Kurt turned quickly around and seemed to let out a breath once he realised who was approaching him.

"Hey gorgeous, what do you want?" Blaine watched him grab his things and started walking off obviously expecting Blaine to follow.

"Well we've only got three days till that assignment is due and we should probably get it done."

Blaine kept following Kurt till they were outside and heading for the bleachers on the football field. There were a few other kids there who looked like freshmen. As soon as they spotted Kurt they all started walking away quickly which turned into a run the closer Kurt got. He walked up the steps to the middle of the seats while Blaine just stared at him from the ground, wondering what they were doing here.

"Are you coming up here or not?"

Blaine slowly started up the steps, watching as Kurt pulled out a packet of cigarettes and a lighter. Blaine carefully sat down next to him, leaving quite a bit of distance between them and Kurt started inhaling and blowing smoke into the wind.

"What are we doing here?"

Kurt looked over at Blaine with an unreadable expression on his face. It looked as though he was contemplating something but shook his head and turned away.

"We can meet at the library tonight if you want. We'll go together and then I'll bring you back here to pick your car up later." Kurt looked down at his phone after getting an alert for a text message then stood up suddenly and started walking off. "See you after school, gorgeous."

Blaine was confused because didn't they have…?

"English starts in ten minutes and we have half of the same classes today." Blaine yelled down to Kurt.

"And like I said the other day, I have a life I like to live." And then he was off.

Blaine sat there for the next few minutes thinking about the mysterious boy. Blaine really didn't know where they stood. It seemed that Kurt would just have these massive mood swings and then act like nothing ever happened. Blaine got up and started walking back to class. He stopped suddenly remembering what Kurt had just said.

_We'll go together and then I'll bring you back here to pick up your car later_

Blaine really hoped that Kurt had suddenly gotten rid of the bike and was now driving a nice, safe car.

* * *

"I am not getting on that thing."

The boys had been standing at Kurt's Harley for about ten minutes because Blaine just refused to get on the bike.

"Come on Anderson, stop being such a wuss, it' just a motorbike. It's not going to kill you." Kurt was already sat on top with his arm stretched out to Blaine, holding a helmet in his hand for him.

"I know, it's just…"

"Just what? Because if you'd prefer we can take your car. You know how long I've been wanting to get you bent over in the backseat of that anyway." Kurt started to get off the bike but Blaine rushed out a no and took the helmet.

It wasn't even that Blaine was scared of the actual bike, or even the driver. He really just didn't want to have to be sitting right up against Kurt, hugging his stomach and to be honest, knowing that in some way Kurt was holding Blaine's life in his hands kind of freaked him out. He knew he was being dramatic with that last part but really couldn't help himself.

Blaine slowly got on and put on his helmet, why Kurt had two anyway was something he really didn't want to know, he put his hands gently on Kurt's waist, not wanting to break any boundaries. Suddenly Kurt grabbed his hands and pulled them around his stomach tightly making him slide further into Kurt's back.

"Look gorgeous, if you don't want to die you're gonna have to actually hold on, got it?" Kurt wasn't facing him but he could tell that Kurt was being serious and didn't want to try arguing with him again.

"Uh, y-yeah. Got it."

Kurt turned the engine on and sped off out of the car park. Blaine realised just how serious Kurt had been as he instinctively wrapped his arms around the other boy tighter and they drove down the street.

The library was only around the corner so they got there fast. As soon as Kurt parked Blaine jumped off as quick as he could, still trembling a little after being on a motorbike for the first time. Kurt just looked at him and laughed a little before getting off himself and walking inside the library.

Blaine stayed outside for a little longer and then turned around and slowly headed inside. He walked through the library finding Kurt at a small table near the back. They were the only other people in there save the librarian. He took a seat across from Kurt surprised to see that he'd already started on the assignment.

"Okay Anderson, show me what you've written so far." Blaine was surprised, to say the least. He knew he shouldn't have been. Kurt was in AP English after all.

"I haven't started yet, I didn't think you would have either." Kurt's head shot up and Blaine was suddenly fearful for himself.

"You haven't started! This is due in three fucking days!" As scary as Kurt was when he yelled, Blaine hated to admit that he was kind of hot too.

"It won't take long. I bet we can get most of it done tonight." Kurt looked back at him doubtfully, shaking his head and looking back down to continue writing.

Blaine quickly followed suit and started on his work as well. They worked in silence for the next two hours straight only talking when one had a question to ask the other. Blaine expected it to be at least a little awkward seeing as they had never spent much time together alone but was happy to find that they got along relatively easily. Granted they weren't talking much but for the first time they were together without Kurt trying to get into Blaine's pants or without one of them yelling at the other.

What surprised Blaine the most was that he actually felt comfortable around Kurt. It didn't feel like this was the first time that they'd spent any amount of time together but that they do this all the time.

When the two hours had passed they had almost finished their assignment and planned to do the rest the next day. Kurt started packing his things and that's when Blaine noticed a scar on Kurt's left shoulder where his top had ridden down a little.

"What happened to your shoulder?" Blaine knew it was probably a dumb idea asking and that Kurt would just yell at him again but his curiosity got the better of him.

Kurt looked over at his shoulder before he'd realised what Blaine was talking about, almost as if it was so insignificant to him that he'd forgotten it was there.

"Oh, that. I got stabbed with a broken bottle about a year back at a party. Dumb idiot thought I was trying to get with his girlfriend. Turns out she was upstairs in bed with his best friend. Serves him right really."

Kurt explained it all with such nonchalance that it left Blaine gaping at him just because of how calm he was about it.

"There are worse things that have happened, Blaine. A little stab to the shoulder is nothing in comparison." Blaine really wanted to ask more but thought better of it this time, not wanting to cross the line. So instead he steered the conversation off in a different direction.

"That's the first time you've called me Blaine."

Kurt looked at him confused for a moment and then realised that he had actually just used his first name. Although it looked like he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't have been, he instead just shrugged his shoulders but Blaine could see the small smile playing on his lips.

"What's with the bowties?"

This time it was Blaine who looked confused. No one had ever questioned his excessive use of bowties before. Yeah, his friends often tease him about them but no one ever asks.

"Uh I… I don't know really. My grandpa gave me one when I was little that I fell in love with. I think it had stars on it. I wanted to be a magician at the time. And I guess I just kept wearing them ever since." Blaine looked up nervously at Kurt. He didn't even know why he felt nervous confessing that to the other boy. It was something to do with talking about childhood that made the conversation deeper than either of them would have wanted.

"Cute. Well I think they make you look like that old man from _UP_." Blaine could tell that Kurt was trying to keep a straight face but the small smile tugging at his lips gave him away. They both looked at each other and burst out laughing. Blaine knew it wasn't even that funny but he couldn't help it. Neither of them could. Their laughs died down after a few minutes and they looked at each other, Blaine wiping tears away.

"We should get going, don't want your car getting locked in the school parking lot now do we." And just like that Kurt was up and walking out of the library.

Blaine got up and followed him outside back to the dreaded Harley Davidson.

"It's not far from here, I can just walk if you-"

Kurt started laughing again before throwing the helmet at Blaine and jumping on, starting up the engine.

"Come on gorgeous, you've been on it once, you can do it again." And with that Blaine was back on the bike, holding onto Kurt for dear life as they sped down the road.

Kurt parked right up next to Blaine's Prius before cutting the engine. Blaine got off the bike, less shaky than last time, and handed Kurt the helmet. Blaine stood there a little awkwardly at first, not really knowing what to say. He settled on a simple 'see you tomorrow' and turned back to his car. Suddenly he was being turned around and held up against the driver's side door.

Blaine looked up into blue eyes that had hints of green in them for a change and then looked down a little to see Kurt licking his pink, glistening lips. Before he knew it Kurt's lips were on his and for a moment he stilled, still in shock from the sudden turn of events, but then he eagerly began to kiss him back. It quickly turned from being sweet and innocent to hot and rough. Kurt pushed him further against the car and sucked his bottom lip into his mouth. Blaine swiped his tongue across Kurt's lips, asking for entrance. When their tongue's met and started battling for dominance they both groaned and grabbed onto each other tighter.

Blaine was about to pull back from the kiss, a little dazed still, when Kurt brought his hand around the front of his jeans and started palming him through his clothes. Blaine tried to pull back but instead Kurt brought his other hand to the back seat door, opening it to try and get them both inside.

Blaine tried pulling away again but Kurt wouldn't stop touching him. Blaine wasn't sure if Kurt was doing this on purpose or if he actually thought that Blaine was okay with this. He started to panic because Kurt's rough touch kept reminding him of only one other thing…

_"What are you gonna do Blaine? Out here all alone, even your other little faggot friend had the brains to run. You're just a faggot and an idiot."_

_Blaine had really started regretting his choice to not run but there was no where he could go so that only left one other thing to do._

_"I'm not going to run off like some coward. I'm not scared of you. Any of you." Blaine's heart was racing as he talked but he had no other option._

_"Well look at the little hero. I think he just saw a pack of guys coming towards him and he couldn't help himself, could he boys." They all started laughing and suddenly he was being cupped through his trousers. He couldn't move or even talk. He didn't know what to do._

_"You like that don't you Blaine, you like being felt up by another guy don't you?" All the other boys started laughing around him but he was still stuck, unable to move or even think at this point._

_Before he knew it, the rough hand around him pushed him onto the ground before he was surrounded by everyone else beating him into the pavement._

With that in mind Blaine reacted and fought back. He pushed Kurt off of him making the coiffed teen fall backwards onto the floor.

"Do NOT touch me, Kurt!" Blaine all but screamed at him. He hadn't been this mad at anyone for a long time and couldn't help the angry tears from flowing down his face.

"Nothing gives you or anyone else the right to me touch me when I don't want to be!" Kurt stood slowly, looking at Blaine with caution.

"Blaine, I-"

"LEAVE, KURT!" Blaine desperately wanted to drive away, but didn't trust himself behind the wheel while in this state.

"Blaine, I didn't mean to-" Kurt said as he slowly approached Blaine. Blaine just looked up at him, feeling pathetic and spoke in a quiet voice.

"Please, just leave, Kurt." And with that, Blaine slid to the ground covering his face with his hands, not daring to look up. He stayed there till he heard Kurt start up his engine and then after a few moments, much to Blaine's relief, drove off.

Blaine stayed in that position for a long time before he calmed himself down and decided that he should probably get home.


	4. Chapter 4

Blaine really didn't want to go to school. He knew he'd see Kurt and he _really_ didn't want to see Kurt. He was angry at Kurt, that was why he didn't want to see him. It wasn't because he felt embarrassed about what happened. Not really. It wasn't that he went home and cried about how pathetic he felt. Most certainly not. And it _definitely_ had nothing to do with the fact that he had actually enjoyed kissing Kurt before the line was crossed. No, it wasn't any of those things. That's what Blaine kept trying to tell himself anyway.

He was angry at Kurt though, there's no doubt about that, and as much as he didn't want to have to see the other boy he knew they had to finish what they didn't get through the night before. He wasn't going to let some boy distract him from what was important.

He walked up to the school doors dreading the day ahead. He didn't want to have to look at Kurt and know that the boy in front of him had seen him in such a vulnerable state. He didn't want Kurt knowing that he had affected Blaine so much. So there was only thing he could do. He strode into the school with the same air of confidence around him that he feels when he performs. He knows it's mainly an act but he can't show Kurt what he's done to him, how he's hurt him. He needs to show Kurt how strong he is, that he can still hold himself up when things get tough. Kurt needs to see that. But, _why _ does Kurt need to see that? Why is it so important for Blaine that Kurt can see his strength or that he doesn't think he hurt Blaine as much as he did? Suddenly stopping in his tracks from the thoughts in his head, someone coming from his right bumped into him.

"Oh God, sorry are you… oh hey Sam!"

"Hey man, you alright? You just like froze in the middle of the hallway. You looked like some weird robot that someone suddenly turned off."

Blaine shook his head at his friend and continued walking.

"Yeah sorry. I'm fine, just zoned out I guessed."

They walked together to their lockers which made Blaine relax significantly. Sam's relaxed nature always did have a way of calming Blaine down, even if he didn't know he was doing anything to help. They arrived at their lockers when Sam turned to Blaine asking if he wanted to go over to his place that afternoon for an x-box marathon. Blaine was all but too happy to accept.

They walked their separate ways which made Blaine instantly aware of the fact that he was headed to English. With Kurt. He almost turned around to start going in the opposite direction when he remembered what he'd told himself earlier. Strength. So he kept going forward. He stood outside the classroom for a moment before walking in, taking his time to inhale a deep breath and then opened the door.

Kurt wasn't there. _Maybe he was late today? Yeah, he must've been late today. _Blaine went and sat in his own seat in the middle of the room. He unpacked his books, straightened everything out and then reached to straighten his bowtie.

He couldn't keep his eyes off the door. Even when their teacher walked in and started the class he couldn't help but glance at the door every few seconds, just waiting and maybe even hoping that Kurt would walk through any minute.

Class ended and there was still no sign of messy chestnut hair. He went to the rest of his morning classes still expecting that Kurt would turn up at any minute but knowing that he wouldn't. He had thought last night that there would be a chance that Kurt wouldn't bother even showing up at school that day but had immediately put that to the back of his mind. Now he wished he'd just listened to himself.

He walked into the cafeteria and saw Sam. It looked like Sam was looking for him and as soon as he noticed Blaine had walked in he whispered something to the rest of the table. Blaine walked towards them all slowly as now everyone from their table was staring at him except for one head. He didn't even think about who the other figure could be as he was still trying to decipher the reason behind the knowing smiles everyone was giving him.

_Oh no, do they know about what happened with Kurt? I should turn around and run and never, ever come back here again._

Just as he was about to turn, the mystery person from their table turned to face him and he was greeted with a smiling Jeff.

"JEFF! What- oh my God. What are you doing here!" Blaine couldn't contain his excitement as he hurried over to the blonde and hugged his best friend for the first time in over a month.

Jeff tried to pull back so he could explain his surprise visit but Blaine just held him tighter, needing the comfort for a moment longer.

"Nice to see you too Blainey. Do I really need an excuse to come and surprise my best friend?" Jeff told him with a smile and a friendly wink.

They sat down together at the table with the other Directioners while they ate their lunch. Blaine knew that Jeff had come for a reason. He wouldn't have come so suddenly without telling Blaine. This had him worrying about his best friend while they ate. He talked and laughed with everyone else like he usually would but he couldn't stop thinking as to the real reason to why Jeff was there.

"So Blainey, your place after school?" Jeff was staring at him, daring him to say no.

"Oh, well I think Sam and I had plans later, you could come maybe?" They both looked at Sam who was in the middle of chewing his fries, taking no notice to the other boys staring at him.

"Sam?"

"Yeah, what?"

"Mind if Jeff comes over later too?" At this, Sam looked at Jeff and seemed a bit confused but suddenly began nodding with wide eyes.

"Uh why don't you guys just hang out, catch up a little. We'll do tomorrow instead, Blaine?" Blaine looked back at Jeff who had a thankful expression on his face directed at Sam. Now he knew something was up.

"Yeah, sure. That sounds good."

They decided to meet back up later after Blaine had finished school for the day while Jeff went to a local music store he liked. Blaine walked into physics with Sam, only half concentrated on the conversation while he thought about Jeff instead. He walked over to his usual seat only to find Kurt sitting there smirking up at him.

Blaine stopped walking and just stared. He hadn't seen Kurt all day and now here he is, smirking like nothing happened?

"Can you please get out of my seat Kurt." He was done with playing games with the boy whose eyes were a mixture of green and blue that day.

"A man with manners. Didn't think I'd be into that but I could go with it." Kurt said as he stood and walked over to his own seat.

Blaine sat down looking at Kurt incredulously. _He is actually acting as if nothing happened._ After all of the thinking Blaine had been doing about Kurt the night before and during the day, this is not what he expected to happen.

"So, _Blaine_, we need to finish our little project tonight. Same time as yesterday? I'll even let you ride with me again." Kurt said with a wink.

"Well, _Kurt_, since you weren't in English this morning I finished it there and handed it in. So now you don't have to waste any more time with me. Enjoy that life of yours your living that you're so often telling me about." Blaine had really had enough of Kurt now. He'd hurt Blaine but apparently that didn't matter to him. _Of course it didn't matter, all he cares about is his dick! _Kurt didn't have a chance to say anything before he was being yelled at by their teacher for having his feet on the table in front of him but Blaine was sure he saw something in his eyes that looked a little bit like hurt.

After class finished they all started walking to glee together, talking about the week's assignment, when Blaine felt someone tug on his sweater and pull him into an empty classroom. He turned around to see Kurt shutting the door behind him. That's when Blaine started to panic.

"K-Kurt, what are you d-doing?" Blaine knew he was being irrational. Kurt wasn't going to do anything. He just wanted Blaine, alone, in an empty classroom with a locked door. No reason to panic at all.

"Blaine I-" Kurt started. Blaine could tell he was struggling to say something which made him relax a little and gently rested against one of the tables behind him.

He started again but still not looking too confident

"I crossed a line last night. I uhm, I don't really know what happened, I mean, you just-" Kurt was really struggling at this point. Head looking around the room and not really able to face Blaine properly.

Blaine was uncomfortable to say the least but he knew this was obviously hard for Kurt so he waited till blue-green eyes met his and gave an encouraging nod, not wanting to say anything at this point.

"Okay, I just wanted to tell you that even though I don't really know what happened last night, maybe I overstepped. I shouldn't have assumed that you would, that you wanted to-"

"Thank you, Kurt." Kurt's wide eyes shot up at Blaine then who couldn't help but smile a little at this reaction.

"You're right, you shouldn't have done that but I do appreciate that you at least realised you'd done something wrong." Blaine looked at Kurt while he spoke, not even trying to hide the small smile on his face.

"And as hard for you as it may be, how about you stop trying to get into my pants from now on?" This elicited a smile from Kurt, making Blaine proud that he caused that.

"Aw, come on Anderson, I know you enjoyed being pushed up against me on Harley." Kurt teased Blaine.

"Harley, you actually call your bike Harley?" Blaine laughed at this watching Kurt as he rolled his eyes.

"Well it is a Harley Davidson, gorgeous, it's only fitting that's what I call him." Kurt unlocked the door and started walking out, waiting for Blaine to follow.

"Most guys call their vehicles a her."

"Well I don't wanna be riding a girl now do I." Kurt retorted with a wink.

"Ignoring that last part. But the name, it's really original, Kurt, I don't know how you thought of that all by yourself." Blaine was giggling now. _Actually giggling._ But he couldn't stop, not with Kurt looking at him the way he was.

"Shut the fuck up Anderson. You love the name and you know it." They walked into glee club, still laughing at one another while everyone else's heads started turning towards them.

"Get it Anderson!" Santana, of course.

"Shut the fuck up Satan, just because you've run out of boys in this school to fuck doesn't mean you have to live vicariously through everyone else's sex lives." Blaine knew that this would be a normal reaction from Kurt no matter who he was talking to, what he wasn't expecting was to see how serious he was.

"Relax Hummel, just making a joke, having some fun. You should try it sometime." Blaine could hear the teasing in Santana's voice, but could also see the darkened expression on Kurt's face as he mumbled a "whatever" to himself.

The walked over to where Sam, Puck and Finn were sitting, Blaine taking a seat next to Sam and watched as Kurt decided between sitting next to him or Puck. Blaine couldn't keep the smile off his face when he chose him.

* * *

Blaine and Jeff were on their way to the Lima Bean in Jeff's car. They shared their usual small talk but could both feel it wasn't just a friendly 'I miss my friend' visit. They parked the car and walked into the Lima Bean and waited in the long queue, which is when Blaine decided to speak up.

"Okay, Jeff. What's wrong? I know you didn't drive all this way just to say hi. Something's up."

Jeff sighed and looked Blaine right in the eye before talking.

"I tried calling you last night Blaine and you didn't pick up. I tried again and you still didn't pick up. I tried calling all night and then you never picked up. I got worried so I came here to check up on you and-"

"Wait, this is about me? I thought something was wrong with you?" Blaine started to say as he remembered waking up to a bunch of missed calls from the previous night. It was starting to make sense now.

"Yes, it's about you. As I was saying, I got worried so I came here just to make sure you were all right. I figured if everything was fine then I'd just get to spend some time with my best friend and if not then you can talk to me. So I drove to McKinley and I bumped into Sam. He said you'd be with them soon and invited me to sit with your friends. So I did. They're nice enough and they all obviously like you but then they started talking about you and some guy named Kurt…"

Blaine's eyebrows raised at this, curious as to why his friends were talking about him at all but then everything clicked into place. He knew where Jeff was taking this and really didn't want it to go there.

"Jeff. I'm fine, okay? Kurt and I didn't really get along at first but we're okay now. You have nothing to worry about."

Jeff sighed and turned to order their coffee's before focusing back to Blaine.

"I know you can handle yourself Blaine but I remember what you were like when we first met. You were so closed off from everyone because you didn't want to get hurt and I can't just stand back and watch while someone hurts you again. So no matter how much you tell me you're fine, you're always gonna be stuck with me making sure you're not lying."

Blaine knew that Jeff could be really overprotective sometimes and as much as it annoyed him, it also made him love his best friend just that little bit more.

"Thanks Jeff. I'm fine, really, but I appreciate you looking out for me." They took their coffees and sat down on the couches across from each other. Neither one of them said anything for a moment but Blaine knew that wouldn't last too long.

"So…" _Oh here we_ _go_. "Kissed any boys yet?" Jeff asked with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

"Jeff come on, you know I'm not gonna go around kissing random boys." It's only half a lie, he told himself.

"Oh, I know! I heard about this place called Scandals-"

"Jeff!"

"You can put on your favourite bowtie-"

"Jeff!" Blaine couldn't help but laugh at this point.

"I'll be your wingman for the night and let you kiss as many boys as you want-"

"Jeff stop it!" Blaine was almost spitting out his drink, trying not to disturb the other patrons.

"I'll even kiss you to make them all jealous, Blainey!"

"Oh my God."

They sat, talked, laughed and drank coffee for hours until it was time for the shop to close. Blaine really didn't want his blonde friend to leave but knew it was a long drive back home for him. He loved being able to see him again and as much as he really did want to spend more time with him he was also looking for an excuse to not have to go back home. He had a good end to an average day and really didn't want to ruin his good mood knowing that Anthony would be home tonight.

So instead of going home he decided to drive around for a while. He hadn't seen much of Lima, not that there's much to see really, but decided that exploring his new town would be better than going home and pretending that he isn't there.

He drove through the main centre of the small town not seeing anything he hadn't noticed before. He kept driving just to waste time and ended up on the other side of Lima to where he lived. _So this must be Lima Heights Adjacent Santana always goes on about. _He kept driving till he was almost out of the town when he decided he should turn around. The more he drove around this side of town, the quicker he realised that it's not a place he would want to come back to. He's already seen two cars get pulled over for speeding and was sure the driver from the second car pulled out a pocket knife or something. Well it was silver and shiny. Could have been the drivers keys but he wouldn't have been surprised if it was a knife. He kept driving and was could have sworn he was witnessing a drug deal happening ahead of him. He kept driving until he noticed out of his window perfectly messed coiffed hair and ripped skinny jeans.

He was sure Kurt wouldn't be here this late at night. Blaine knew that Kurt was a bit… shady? Was that even the right word? There was no way Kurt would be into anything serious like this would he? As he started to slow the car down he realised that he barely even knew Kurt. He could be in a gang for all he knew. Blaine had practically stopped the car on the opposite side of the road to Kurt and the other guy. The other guy towered over Kurt. Probably about Finn's height. He couldn't really see what he looked like, he wasn't at the right angle, but he could tell that Kurt looked almost… _scared._ It looked like they were arguing about something when Kurt handed an envelope over to the other guy. That's also when Kurt noticed Blaine. Well it seemed that he noticed Blaine's car first, and then realised who the driver was.

Blaine tried to duck and hide thinking that he felt like he was in some corny action movie or something. Kurt had already noticed him, though, and was opening the door to the passenger's side seat. Blaine sat up and looked at Kurt and if thought he'd seen Kurt angry before then he must have been crazy.

"What the _fuck_ are you doing here Anderson. Are you trying to get yourself killed?" Blaine would have sworn that Kurt could've killed him just with the intensity of his gaze in that moment.

"I-I was just driving around and thought I saw you. I was heading home. Didn't t-think it was that big of a deal being-"

"Get out of here now before I drag you home myself." And with that Kurt was out of the car and standing right in front of it saying something to the other guy and grabbing a skateboard before coming back into the car.

"I need a ride home."

Blaine looked at Kurt, confused about everything that was happening. He wanted to ask questions but knew it wasn't going to end well if he did.

They drove in silence only filled by Kurt's directions to his own home. Blaine had so much running through his head. He kept thinking of different reasons as to what Kurt could have been doing but nothing made sense. He's obviously angry that Blaine had seen him. Did that mean he didn't want anyone knowing what he was doing or just Blaine? The only thing Blaine knew for sure though, Kurt was _scared_. Whoever the other man was had Kurt worried about something. Blaine knew they didn't know each other very well, or at all really, but you didn't have to know someone to see obvious fear on their face.

"Just up on your left." Kurt's voice was quiet, had been the whole ride. It unnerved Blaine. He almost missed the driveway but turned just at the right moment.

"Hummel Tire and Lube? I thought I was taking you home?" Blaine guessed it must have been some family establishment from the name. Maybe someone was here that Kurt wanted to talk to.

"My Dad's car shop. I help out sometimes." Kurt got out of the car and went to close the door but looked at Blaine first. It looked like he was thinking about something before he told Blaine to go inside with him.

Blaine didn't think it would be a good idea to follow Kurt inside but he also wanted answers. So he turned off the car, locked his doors and slowly followed the other boy inside. When he walked in, he noticed that Kurt had changed into a different shirt, one with oil stains and a couple of rips in different places. He was kneeling down next to his bike, _Harley_, Blaine reminded himself.

"You don't have to stand at the door." Kurt looked at Blaine swiftly and then turned back to what he was doing.

Blaine slowly walked forward, looking around the garage. It was a crowded place. It had four cars in there and shelves with tools everywhere. The walls were also lined with different tools. He walked around what must have been an office and saw a wall that was different to the others. There were photos everywhere. Photos from the shop's opening day, next to it a check, must have been the shops first check. There were photos of other men who looked like they must work there but most of the photos contained an older man with a baseball cap on standing next to a women with large blue eyes and chestnut brown hair. There were a few photos of the couple with a young kid who started growing up through the pictures. Kurt.

He looked so different. In the younger ones they were all so happy. Blaine assumed they must have been Kurt's parents. There were practically no recent photos. Kurt was dressed completely differently in them compared to how he dressed now. He was more fashionable back then, Blaine gathered. Even when he was little he was dressed in shirts and bowties. Something Blaine could _definitely_ appreciate. There was even a picture of the three of them having a tea party. There was only one picture of Kurt with his Dad without his Mum there. They both had smiles on their faces but they weren't _really_ smiling. This was the picture that most resembled the Kurt he knew now. He was smiling with his mouth but not his eyes. Before seeing these pictures, Blaine thought he'd seen Kurt smile properly, now he wasn't so sure and he couldn't wait to see the live version of all the other pictures that lined the wall.

"So are you gonna stare at those all night or help me here?"

Blaine looked over at Kurt who was now stood up holding a tool in Blaine's direction. He walked over and took his bowtie off (it was one of his favourites, he didn't want it ruined) and rolled up his sleeves before taking the object from Kurt and kneeling down.

Kurt instructed him on what to do and what they were doing required them to have their sides pressed up against one another. Blaine could practically feel the tension rolling off Kurt as he worked. He guessed fixing cars and motorbikes was a stress reliever for the other boy.

"So what happened to your bike?"

"Harley, Blaine. He has a name."

Finally Blaine saw something that almost resembled a smile, even if Kurt did try hiding it.

"So then what happened to Harley?"

"He wouldn't start so I brought him here. I was gonna wait till tomorrow but realised now would be a way better time." Kurt glanced at Blaine when he said this, probably knowing that questions were going to be asked soon.

"So if I ask questions about earlier am I going to get any answers?" Blaine was nervous when he spoke but he'd already waited too long at this point and his curiosity won him over.

"Well, it depends what you ask I guess."

"Who was the other guy?"

"…a friend." Kurt's voice trembled slightly when he spoke, betraying what he'd just said.

"You didn't seem very friendly." Blaine spoke softly. He didn't want Kurt thinking he was judging him at all. He was just worried about his friend. _Friends?_ We're they even friends? Blaine was pretty sure it couldn't even be called that.

"Well what were you doing with him?"

Kurt finished what he was doing on the bike and stood up from where he was. Blaine followed and sat on a stool not far behind him while Kurt sat on his bike.

"Why do you care Blaine?" Kurt asked the other boy in an almost whisper.

"I-I don't know." And Blaine didn't know. He kept asking himself over and over again why he cared so much. He'd been asking himself for the last few weeks why he cared that they'd barely talked and again now that he thought Kurt could be in trouble. All he knew was that there was something about the this boy with messy hair, tight jeans and eyes that couldn't be defined as only one colour. Something drew him in and he really wanted to know what that was.

"I really don't know why I care Kurt but for some reason I do. I don't want you to get hurt."

"Blaine. I have been hurt so many times already that nothing I do now can hurt any more than I've already hurt in the past. I just have one thing I need you to do." Kurt looked Blaine right in the eye when he said this and Blaine just nodded.

"I need to make sure you don't tell anyone about this. No one can know that you saw me there. This is really important and I need you to promise me that you won't say a thing, okay?" Kurt's eyes were so intense when he looked at Blaine. It wasn't the same gaze from when Kurt found him earlier that night but he was back to looking scared again. Blaine knew that he shouldn't agree and that he should probably tell someone like Puck that he thought Kurt was in trouble. He also trusted Kurt, though, and by the looks of things Kurt was beginning to trust him as well.

"I don't like the idea but okay, I won't say anything."

"Promise, Blaine?"

"I promise."

They sat there and looked at each other for a while. Blaine knew that after just a few weeks of knowing each other they'd already had so many ups and downs but this moment was different. This moment Blaine could feel that something had changed for the both of them. A different dynamic in the relationship maybe. It was felt by both of them. They knew it wasn't some perfect moment of clarity or anything, in fact is was the exact opposite. They both had questions that they wanted to ask the other but neither were brave enough to ruin the silence of the moment. A moment that held so much potential. A moment that held the promise of trust. Something that was rare for them both to come across.

After about five minutes of just sitting there and staring at each other, Blaine was the first so speak up.

"It's late and I have to get home. I can give you a ride if you want?" Blaine asked Kurt, just a little bit hopeful that Kurt would accept.

"Uh I wanna finish up here first. I live the next street down so I can just walk."

Blaine felt nervous about leaving Kurt alone after what he'd seen earlier but knew that Kurt already had his mind made up.

"Okay. Well I'll see you tomorrow then?"

"I'll see you tomorrow."

Blaine stood there for a moment a little awkwardly before turning back to where he entered the garage.

"Blaine?"

Blaine turned back around to Kurt who hadn't moved from his previous spot yet.

"Yes, Kurt?"

"Thank you."

Blaine could honestly say he didn't know what Kurt was thanking him for. Whether it was for picking him up earlier, worrying about him or for promising to not say anything. He hoped it was all.

"You're welcome." Blaine said with a little smile and then turned and walked back out to his car and headed off home.


	5. Chapter 5

"Right there, quickly!"

"I'm trying but he's going too fast."

"Hurry up, we're gonna lose!"

"I got him!"

"That was me you idiot! Have you ever even played any type of video game in your life? You suck Blaine!"

"Yeah he's right, you're really bad at this dude."

Blaine was sitting on the couch at the Hudson household trying to win a bet that he could beat Sam at some new video game Finn had. He didn't even know which one it was, he couldn't care less to be honest.

Sam was sitting on the floor at his feet with Finn on the recliner and Kurt on the other side of the couch silently laughing to himself. He knew he was bad at video games but so was Sam, or at least he used to be when he boarded at Dalton.

"Finn you have no food! Why do you never have food? I'm ordering pizza, what do you guys want?" Puck yelled from the kitchen. He'd been in there almost the entire time they'd all been at Finn's house looking for food. Blaine was also pretty sure he was actually snooping around the house, looking for what, Blaine had no idea.

"Blaine you owe me ten bucks and I'm never playing you again. Finn, you're playing now."

Blaine handed the controller over to Finn and sat back on the couch pretending to watch. It had been two weeks since the night Blaine had found Kurt and since then they'd become a lot closer. They sat together in all their shared classes and Kurt wordlessly started walking Blaine to all his other classes. Any tension that had been there between them had disappeared and it had been noticed by everyone in glee as well, although no one ever said anything about it, something that Blaine was thankful for.

He looked over at Kurt who was still laughing at Blaine for being so bad at the game. Blaine turned to face Kurt properly and sat against the armrest with his feet on the couch. He reached his leg out to kick the other boy at a failed attempt to get him to stop laughing. Instead Kurt sat so he was mirroring Blaine and grabbed his leg and started tickling his foot. Instantly Blaine was laughing uncontrollably trying to kick Kurt away with his other foot.

"Kurt! K-Kurt, stop! It's n-not funny-" Blaine then practically screamed out when Kurt also took hostage of his other foot and wrapped his legs around Blaine's stretched out ones so Blaine couldn't move them anywhere and began to tickle them both.

They were both laughing so hard at this point that they'd forgotten there were other people in the room with them. Blaine was finally able to get his feet away from Kurt and practically pounced onto him tickling his sides. He found one particularly sensitive spot right below Kurt's left ribcage that had Kurt squirming underneath him, trying to get away. They heard someone coughing behind them which made Blaine suddenly stop and looked up to see Sam, Finn and Puck all watching them with amused expressions.

"We can either leave the room or I'm pretty sure Finn won't mind if you use his room for whatever it you're both thinking about doing to each other." Puck said with a smirk. He went and sat next to Sam and all three boys turned their attention back to the T.V. Blaine looked down at Kurt to see him staring at his lips the same way he did the night they kissed. Kurt slowly looked back up at Blaine and they held each other's gaze for a few seconds before Blaine got off Kurt and sat back down on the couch. Kurt sat up too and grabbed Blaine's arm before he went to the other side. Kurt then draped his long legs over Blaine's lap and took his right hand to look at the ring sitting on his middle finger. They didn't say much to each other for a while so Blaine just watched as Kurt played with the silver ring that had a turquoise band through the middle on his finger. After a while Kurt's attention went back to the screen in front of them but he never let go of Blaine's hand.

About fifteen minutes later the pizza arrived forcing Kurt and Blaine to sit apart. Blaine would be lying if he said he didn't miss the contact but knew he wouldn't be admitting it any time soon.

After they finished eating, Finn's Mum walked through the door.

"Hey Mrs H."

"Hey there Mrs Hudson."

"Hi boys, Finn can you give me a hand in the kitchen."

"Sure Mum."

Puck and Sam played for a little while longer while Blaine watched. Kurt had gotten quiet after a while and it had Blaine worrying a bit. Blaine had started worrying about Kurt whenever he started to act even slightly out of character. He felt helpless not doing anything about what he'd seen but also knew that he wouldn't betray Kurt's trust ever.

Mrs Hudson walked into the lounge room after Finn, announcing that she was going back out again.

"Finn I should be home in a couple of hours, boys it's always nice seeing you but it's getting late and it's a school night. Probably time you started to head off home." She looked at Kurt as she spoke and although to anyone else it seemed like she was just being friendly, Blaine watched as Kurt looked back into her eyes and slightly nodded. It looked like they were having an unspoken conversation between the two of them but no one else noticed anything. Blaine couldn't help but think that maybe they didn't get along for some reason and Mrs Hudson was just trying to be nice about kicking them out.

"Oh hi there, I'm Carole Hudson. Apparently none of these boys think I'm worth introducing you too." Carole greeting with a chuckle.

"Nice to meet you Mrs Hudson, I'm Blaine Anderson." He said as he stood up to shake her hand.

"Oh please, call me Carole. And that goes for all you boys." Carole then said her goodbye's and gave Finn a big kiss on the cheek obviously trying to embarrass him in front of his friends.

"Yeah I gotta get home too. You need a ride back gorgeous?" Kurt asked Blaine as he stood up and grabbed his helmet.

Kurt had continued calling Blaine gorgeous but it was no longer as a way to impress Blaine. It came out naturally and he was pretty sure that Kurt didn't even know he was saying it half the time. Blaine secretly loved it though.

"Yeah, thanks. See you guys tomorrow." Blaine said as he grabbed the other helmet and followed Kurt outside.

They sat on Harley and Blaine wrapped his arms around the taller boy. He'd grown more comfortable about having to hold onto Kurt when riding. He was still nervous about being on a motorcycle though so every time they went around a corner or Kurt sped up, his arms instantly held onto Kurt tighter and every time he felt the other boy's stomach muscles tense up a little. He rested his head against Kurt's back, enjoying the sun while it lasted as it was only a couple of weeks till winter.

They arrived at Blaine's house not long after. Blaine got off the bike and undid his helmet to hand it back to Kurt. Instead this time Kurt didn't take it.

"Keep it. You're the only other person that uses it anyway." Kurt told him through a smile. It was small, possibly one of the smallest smiles he'd ever given Blaine but it was also the most real. Blaine didn't bother trying to refuse it after that so he dropped his arm to his side and smiled back.

"I'll see you tomorrow gorgeous." And with that Kurt was off.

* * *

Kurt entered his house getting ready for another argument with his Dad. It was the same thing every Wednesday night. He'd get home, fight with Burt about going to the AA meeting and then not talk for the next couple of days because Kurt would be so disappointed that Burt didn't go, again. After the first few weeks of going, Burt had decided that he wasn't an alcoholic and didn't need to spill everything about himself to complete strangers who thought they could help him. That was about two months ago now and Kurt had tried every week to get him to go back.

As he walked upstairs preparing himself, he didn't expect to find his Dad sitting on his bed staring down at a picture of Elizabeth. Smiling. It was the first time he had seen Burt smile in months. He didn't dare speak as he knew that this was a rare occasion that he didn't want ruined just yet. So instead he stood at the door and watched as his Dad stared down lovingly at his Mum.

"On this day, twenty six years ago, I met your Mother. As soon as I saw her I knew I had to ask her out. So I did. We were both lining up at the supermarket and I cracked some dumb joke about how slow the line was. She laughed but I'm pretty sure she didn't find it funny, she was just being polite. We'd barely spoken for five minutes and I was already asking her to go out with me that night. We met up at some tiny little restaurant that was closed down a couple years later. I was so nervous the entire night. I spilled my drink on her, tripped over in front of her and almost crashed the car when I was driving her home." Burt was talking with tears in his eyes but the smile never faded. Kurt had walked into the room and sat down next to his Dad on the bed and listened intently as he continued to speak.

"I walked her to the door because I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible knowing that it would possibly be the last time I would ever see her again because I'd made such a fool of myself. Despite that, I knew I had to at least try ask for a second date. So I did. And she surprised me by saying yes. I asked her why she would want to go out on a second date with me when the first date was such a disappointment and she told me that the day I disappoint her will be the day we stop seeing each other. She never said no another date.

"I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror and all I could think was that if she was here right now and I asked her out, she would say no because I have become such a disappointment. Not just her but to you too, Kurt. So you and I are gonna go to this meeting tonight and we are gonna go every single Wednesday night until I know that your Mother would say yes to dates if she could."

They both had tears in their eyes at this point, neither of them saying anything while they looked down at the one person they both love more than anything. Without saying a word Kurt got up after a few minutes and Burt followed. They walked downstairs and got ready to go. Kurt waited for his Dad at the front door. When Burt was ready and went to open the door Kurt leaned in to hug his father. It was awkward. They both knew that. But Kurt couldn't help but feeling at least a little hopeful. He knew he shouldn't feel this way and for a long time he had put in a lot of effort to never getting his hopes up. He knew it only led to disappointment.

Kurt knew they had a long way to go but he was thankful that Burt was actually trying now. He just hoped it stayed this way.

It took them fifteen minutes to drive to the church the meeting were held at. The car ride had been silent and the air still felt heavy between them but Kurt didn't really mind. He just couldn't help feeling like his Mum was watching over them, still helping them like she always had.

They walked into the building and were met by the host of the meetings as they sat down.

"Kurt! Burt! I'm so glad you both made it. We haven't seen you here in a while."

"Hey Mrs Hudson."

"Kurt I just told you, call me Carole." She told him with a warm smile.

The first time Kurt and his Dad went to one of these meetings, he was surprised to see that his friend's Mum was the meeting host. Carole had explained to him that when her late husband came home from war a few years back, he hadn't been himself and instead had drunk his last few months away and then died from an overdose, not in the war like Finn still believed. She told Kurt how she always hated that she couldn't help her husband so decided she'll do what she can to help other people. He then promised her that he wouldn't tell Finn about his Dad as long as Carole never told anyone about Burt.

Kurt watched as Carole and his Dad talked. His Dad was a bit reserved, not really wanting to be there in the first place, but Carole had a wide smile on her face. Carole always had a soft spot for Burt since she knew he was Kurt's dad.

Towards the end of the meeting Kurt felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He knew he probably shouldn't be opening it considering where he was but some guy named Paul was introducing himself and his monotonous voice made Kurt's decision easy.

_I found my bowtie with stars on it that my grandpa gave me as a kid! –Blaine_

Kurt supressed a laugh when he read over his friend's message earning a few glances from around the room which he ignored. A few seconds later another text came through.

_Would you still talk to me if I wore it to school tomorrow? –Blaine_

This time Kurt couldn't keep back the laugh that escaped his lips earning him an elbow in the ribs from his Dad.

_I will slushy you myself if you wear that tomorrow. Would it even fit anymore? –Kurt_

He put his phone in his pocket just in time to hear Carole end the meeting for the night. They all recited one of those _'I'm an alcoholic and I believe in myself' _chants before getting up and heading over to the table with tea and coffee on it.

While he waited for his Dad and Carole to finish talking he pulled his phone back out to find another message from Blaine.

_You wouldn't dare ruin one of my bowties! :( I would have to steal Harley from you if you even tried! –Blaine_

_You know you wouldn't be able to steal him even if you wanted to Anderson. You can barely ride him without screaming let alone try drive him yourself. -Kurt_

_Do you actually try to make everything you say dirty or does it just come out that way? –Blaine_

Kurt didn't know what Blaine was talking about so he reread his last message and smirked to himself realising what he'd said.

_I wasn't implying anything gorgeous. That was all you, you dirty thing ;) –Kurt_

Kurt could imagine Blaine's face as he read that message. He could almost see the blush that would have started to crawl up his neck and onto his cheeks. It made him smile just thinking about the other boy.

"Come on kiddo, time to get outta here."

Kurt put his phone back at the sound of his father's voice and they walked back to the car together.

"So Dad, what'd you think?" Kurt was nervous asking, he knew Burt had promised earlier that they would go every week but Kurt couldn't help but think that maybe he'd changed his mind after actually having to go to the meeting.

"I think that next week you should leave your phone at home."

Next week. _Next Week._

"So… you definitely wanna go next week?"

"I told you I would, didn't I?"

"I know I just, wanted to make sure." Kurt knew he was smiling like an idiot but he couldn't help himself. He felt like he was almost getting his Dad back again.

"I'm serious about the phone though Kurt."

"Yeah, whatever Dad."

They arrived home not long after and Kurt went straight downstairs to his room to change. He pulled his phone out of his pocket expecting to find a reply from Blaine but found his screen to be blank. He frowned and decided to call his friend instead.

The phone only rang twice before Blaine picked up.

"Kurt?"

"Well who else is it gonna be gorgeous?" Kurt put the phone down on his bed and put it on speaker so he could change.

"I just wasn't expecting you to call me."

"Well you never text me back. I couldn't help but wonder why..."

Kurt grinned to himself when Blaine paused over the phone and wondered if it was a good idea to tell him that he was in the middle of changing while they spoke.

"W-well you said… I mean you promised me you'd stop-"

Kurt burst into laughter at this point. Blaine was so obviously inexperienced and Kurt loved being able to make the other boy blush and babble nonsense when he so much as mentioned sex.

"It was a joke Anderson. Stress less. Speaking of Harley, you want me to pick you up tomorrow?"

Kurt only ever let other guys ride on Harley with him if he knew he was getting something out of it. Never had he let someone ride on it more than once or for any other reason so he still surprised himself every time he asked Blaine if he wanted a ride.

"Uh, yeah sure. Thanks."

"I have to go now. It's getting cold standing here naked and the shower is simply calling my name. See you in the morning gorgeous." Kurt hung up before Blaine had the chance to reply and walked into his bathroom to have a nice long shower and if he thought of dark curls and hazel eyes as he touched himself under the hot spray of water, well who could blame him?

* * *

Blaine sat on his bed looking down at his phone for about five minutes after Kurt hung up. He knew Kurt was just joking. He was hoping Kurt was joking because he really didn't want to be thinking of Kurt in that way.

There was a knock on Blaine's door that he barely registered until his Mum was walking into his room. She walked over to his bed, gave him a kiss on the cheek and lay down on her stomach on the unoccupied side of his bed.

"Hi sweetie."

"Hi Mum."

Blaine continued staring down at his phone simply for a distraction. He loved his Mum more than anyone else in the world but he heard his parents arguing downstairs again and knew why she was here. He could feel her staring at him. He knew she wasn't angry at all, this was just her way of waiting for him to talk first.

"I don't know what you want me to say Mum."

Susan sat up so she could look at her son properly. She cupped Blaine's chin and forced him to look right at her.

"I'm worried. You and your Father haven't spoken for over a month. Almost two now. I know things have been awkward between the two of you since your fight but I think you need to try talk to him."

"I need to talk to him? Why can't he try talking to me for once? I am always the one going to him, apologising for whatever fight we've had. Well I'm done, I'm not going to say sorry for this. I can't. He went too far Mum. I'll try when he does."

They stared at each other for a few moments, both thinking about what the other had said. Blaine desperately wanted his Dad to understand. He wanted his Dad to love him like normal parents do, like his Mum does.

"I know he did sweetheart and I'm sorry about that." She reached over and hugged Blaine with so much force Blaine thought she'd never let go. "I just want the two of you to get along again."

Blaine held onto his Mum for the next few minutes. He revelled in the comfort her warm arms gave him. Ever since he was a child, the only thing that could calm him down when he was having a nightmare or a bad day was his Mother's embrace.

"Isn't that the bowtie your grandfather gave you when you were a kid?"

* * *

_Get your ass out here gorgeous –Kurt_

Blaine slung his bag over his shoulder, grabbed his helmet and practically ran down the stairs. After giving his Mum a quick goodbye kiss on the cheek and ran out the front door without a glance at his Dad.

"Hey Kurt."

"Hey gorgeous. Hop on, hold tight and get ready to ride, baby." Kurt greeted with a flirtatious wink.

Blaine laughed but did what he was told. They were halfway to school when Kurt took a wrong turn and kept going. Blaine tried asking him where they were going but never got an answer from Kurt. After a couple of minutes Kurt turned into a car park.

"Why are we at the Lima Bean, Kurt?"

"Because someone needs their coffee to function properly in the mornings now don't they Blaine?"

Kurt handed him a travel coffee cup that Blaine hadn't noticed sitting in a cup holder. As much as he tried he couldn't keep the smile off his face knowing that Kurt had put so much thought into simply getting him to school in the morning.

"I'll wait out here. Don't take too long."

Blaine was in and out in a matter of three minutes and they were once again off to school.

They arrived at McKinley and Blaine let go of Kurt and jumped off Harley. He turned to see Kurt sitting there staring at him with a smile on his face.

"What are you staring at?"

"Uhmm…" Kurt's cheeks began to tint a very light shade of pink as he coughed a little into his hand. "Nothing really, just you in that helmet, it's uh…"

"It's what?"

"Cute."

They stared at each other awkwardly and a little disbelievingly for a moment. Blaine not able to believe that Kurt had said that and Kurt not believing that he'd said something like that to another guy.

Blaine laughed a little awkwardly, turned to walk into school and motioned for Kurt to follow him. They walked in silence till they reached Kurt's locker and they were both suddenly slapped hard on the back by none other than Puck.

"So, excited for Saturday night boys?" Puck asked both of them.

Blaine looked over at Kurt, not knowing what Puck was talking about, who had a guilty look on his face.

"What's Saturday?" Blaine questioned slowly. Puck's face suddenly turned from excited to annoyed and stared at Kurt.

"You didn't tell him, Kurt? Dude what's your problem? Wait, you guys aren't not talking again or something right, cause I dunno if I can deal with you both all sulky again. It'd kinda depressing." Puck stated while throwing an arm over Blaine's shoulders.

"I was gonna tell him it was just us guys and then bring him to your place. He wasn't supposed to know till he got there Puck. It is his first after all. But now you ruined it, idiot."

Kurt finished at his locker and the three of them turned and started down the hallway toward Blaine's locker where they could see Sam waiting for them with Quinn.

"Can one of you please explain to me what's going on?"

Puck and Kurt looked at each other with large mischievous grins covering their faces and then looked back at Blaine. They both walked up to him slowly and stood either side of him. Puck slung his arm back over his shoulder on his right and Kurt grabbed him around the waist from his other side.

Simultaneously they leaned close into Blaine ears and yelled one word.

"PARTY!"

* * *

"No Rachel, you will not be singing every song for Regionals. You have to let other people have their chance at singing lead too-"

"But Mr Schue, if I could just-"

"Rachel, we go over this every single time. What about the others like Mercedes or Santana. This is a group we need to-"

As Mr Schuester had his weekly argument with Rachel over solo's, Blaine moved his chair a little closer to Kurt's and whispered into his ear.

"So why is Puck having a party?"

"This weekend every year his Mum goes away with her sister. I have no idea why but it means that every year Puck takes advantage and has the biggest party of the year."

Blaine silently nodded and sat back on his seat properly. He was in two minds about going. He was excited because it was his first real party after all. He was never invited to any of the parties at his school before Dalton and at Dalton no one really had parties because they all lived in the same dorm that never allowed them to get away with anything let alone a party. So yeah, he was excited about finally getting to experience a high school party but on the other hand he was a little nervous. Knowing the party was at Puck's he wasn't sure what to expect. He knew there would be alcohol but he'd never been drunk before. He was pretty certain that there'd be drugs there too but he'd heard too many horror stories about people having their drinks spiked at parties and didn't want something like that happening to him. So he was excited and nervous but knew that he'd never miss the opportunity for his first party.

"Stop worrying gorgeous," Kurt whispered in his ear. "don't take a drink from anyone other than me Puck, Finn or Sam, don't say yes to drugs, obviously, and don't go into an empty room with some boy trying to get a quick fuck… unless it's me of course." Kurt added with a wink.

Blaine knew he was worrying for no reason. He trusted his friends. He knew if he just stayed close to them everything would be fine.

Blaine's phone vibrated in his pocket and saw that his Mum was calling. He knew she wouldn't call if it wasn't important so he excused himself from the room and answered her call.

"Hey Mum, is everything okay?"

"Hi sweetie. I'm really sorry to do this to you but I got a call from an editor in New York and they want to meet me to discuss maybe publishing my book-"

"Mum are you serious? That's amazing! I'm so happy you finally got someone interested in publishing it-"

Blaine's Mum had finished writing a novel a year ago and had been contacting editors ever since to try and find someone to publish it. So far she'd been out of luck but it finally looked like her luck was turning around.

"Blaine sweetie, don't get your hopes up yet, they just want to talk. I'm leaving tonight and won't be home till Monday morning so it'll just be you and your Father for the weekend."

"Oh. Well uhm, I-I'm not gonna worry about that, I'm just really proud of you Mum." Blaine knew his Father only had one shift that weekend so he'll be home most of the time leaving them both alone and possibly actually needing to communicate at some point during the weekend. He really wasn't looking forward to it.

"Blaine, I think this a really good chance to-"

"Call me when you land, Mum."

"Blaine-"

"I have to get back to glee, I think they're waiting for me."

Susan sighed in defeat into the phone and chose to ignore Blaine's stubbornness. "Okay. I love you Blaine." His Mum always said those words with such force, always had since he was a kid. Blaine didn't think he'd ever be used to how much hearing her say them affected him.

"I love you too Mum. Have a safe trip." He hung up and waited outside in the corridor for a moment before walking back inside and having to act like everything was still okay.

He didn't look at Kurt as he sat down but could feel the other boy's glasz eyes on him. He didn't want the other guys knowing anything about his relationship with his Dad. He didn't want their pity and he especially didn't want it from Kurt.

He wanted to get through the weekend without having to deal with his Dad. Maybe going to Puck's party will be a good idea after all.

Glee, unfortunately, went by quickly. Blaine was dreading going home that night knowing that he'd probably be forced to talk to his Dad. He was purposely getting his books out of his locker slowly while Kurt waited silently next to him.

They walked to Harley in complete silence. Blaine could see that Kurt felt awkward but he couldn't care less. He just wanted to get home, lock himself in his room and not leave till the morning. He and Kurt left the car park but instantly turned the opposite way to his house. He tried asking Kurt where they were going but didn't get an answer so he just held on and let Kurt drive.

It took a while till they reached their destination and Blaine was definitely confused. They were parked in the middle of a forest. Kurt wordlessly got off his motorcycle and started walking. Blaine got off and followed Kurt. After a few minutes they were walking into a massive clearing surrounded by trees and white trillium flowers scattered the clearing.

Blaine slowly walked into the clearing and saw Kurt walk over to two tree stumps. Blaine watched as he pulled a black marker out of his pocket and started writing on the stump. The closer Blaine got he realised that Kurt was actually tracing over faded words that were already there.

"Who wrote that?"

Kurt looked up at Blaine and then turned back and focused on what he was doing.

"My Mum wrote these lyrics," Kurt motioned to the stump he was working on and then motioned over the stump next to it "and I wrote those lyrics."

Kurt's voice was quiet and clipped, nothing like Blaine had heard before. He still wasn't sure why Kurt had brought him here so he lay down in the grass near Kurt and waited for him to talk. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. He hadn't felt this relaxed in such a long time. He was amazed that just being somewhere like this could do that to him especially with everything he knew he was going home to.

He felt Kurt lie down next to him. They lay there not talking for a few minutes, just enjoying the cool breeze hitting their faces.

"My Mum started bringing me here when I was a kid and now I just come here when I need to get away from everything."

"She doesn't come with you anymore?"

Kurt didn't answer for a moment and Blaine turned his head to look at the other boy. He could see so much sadness planted on his face. His eyes looked distant and Blaine suddenly missed his smile more than anything.

"She died two years ago."

Kurt's voice was so soft and quiet that Blaine had barely heard him. He really hoped that he'd heard wrong but could tell by the look on his friend's face that he hadn't.

"Kurt I'm-"

"Don't, Blaine. All I've ever heard for the last two years is people telling me how sorry they are and how things are supposed to get better. Well what they don't know is that no matter how sorry they say they are it won't bring her back and how would they know if things were gonna get better for me. They didn't know anything. They don't know how hard it's been. They don't know everything I've had to go through since her death. So don't you of all people sit there and tell me how sorry you are or act all sympathetic because it won't change anything. I can deal with everyone else's pity but not yours."

Blaine was taken aback by what Kurt had said. He'd never expected to see him open up so much to anyone let alone himself. He felt so pathetic, lying there doing absolutely nothing while Kurt completely opened up to him. He knew there was nothing he could say to make Kurt feel better so instead he grabbed the other boy's hand and held on lightly. He felt Kurt tense next to him but didn't let go.

They lay there for about an hour, not speaking a word to one another. He felt Kurt eventually relax next to him but never tried to let go of his hand. He thought about everything Kurt had said and couldn't help but feel sad for the other boy. He didn't want to feel happy if Kurt wasn't happy. So instead he lay there and felt sad that his friend had to lose someone he obviously loved so much.

"Did she love you back?"

Kurt looked over at Blaine but he didn't return the look. He just waited on Kurt's response, needing to know that his Mother loved him as much as he loved her. He expected to hear Kurt asking why but instead all he heard was a forceful "Yes" as if Kurt was defending her.

"Good. You're lucky."

There was a part of Blaine that desperately wanted Kurt to ask him what he meant because he needed to tell someone about his Dad and he knew that Kurt wouldn't pity him like he'd feared. On the other hand, even though Kurt was opening up himself, he didn't want to scare him off by sharing his own problems.

Kurt stayed silent and didn't ask any questions. He just looked back up at the clouds and squeezed Blaine's hand a little. Blaine couldn't help but feel a little disappointed.

Not long after Kurt got up off the grass and began walking toward the trail that led them there in the first place. Blaine stood and followed behind. The ride back was quiet and the air between them was thick, but Blaine held onto Kurt tighter than he'd ever held onto him before, needing to feel close to him.

They arrived at Blaine's house and he saw that his Dad was already home. He didn't let go of Kurt and he didn't remove his head from leaning on his back. They sat there in silence while Blaine revelled in the moment, wanting to be able to remember every detail when he left and went inside. He continued hugging Kurt from behind, needing to remember the feel of someone else's body and warmth up against his own so that hopefully when he walked inside he could still feel it.

Slowly he let go of Kurt and got off the motorcycle. He started to walk up his driveway when he felt Kurt grab his arm. He turned around to face the other boy.

"If you, uh, if you ever need somewhere to go, to get away from whatever it is that's going on, you can go back there. I won't mind if you do. It helps me, maybe it'll help you out too." Kurt looked into Blaine's eyes and slowly lifted his hand to cup Blaine's cheek. Blaine sighed into the touch and closed his eyes and leant into it a little. With his other hand on the back of his neck, Kurt pulled Blaine down to him and softly kissed his cheek. He lingered there for longer than Blaine had expected. It was so sweet and chaste that he couldn't believe that it had come from Kurt. They parted without a word and as Blaine walked straight past his Dad and up to his room he could still feel Kurt's lips on his cheek. It was nothing like the other kiss they'd shared. This was chaste and sweet and made it whole body tingle. It couldn't have been any more perfect.


	6. Chapter 6

**Word of warning - Mentions of drug use**

* * *

"So how are things going with your Dad? He actually looks sober today." Puck was lying down on Kurt's bed repeatedly tossing a tennis ball in the air and catching it while Kurt was sitting at his laptop making a playlist for Puck's party that night.

"Well he went to the meeting the other night, finally, and is trying to convince me that he's gonna go every week. Don't know how long that's gonna last though."

"Hmmm." Puck was quiet for a while which Kurt knew meant that there was more he wanted to say but didn't want to overstep. Usually Puck had no problem with overstepping but even he had a limit and getting Kurt Hummel angry was a place he really didn't want to go.

"Okay," Puck stood up and walked over to Kurt and sat on top of the desk he was sitting at. "So what's the deal with you and Anderson? You were so sure you were gonna fuck him and now it's been almost two months and so far you've managed to kiss him and make him cry because of it."

"I didn't tell you that just so you can use it against me. Anyway he's not like that. He's not just gonna get fucked and be okay with it. He's not that type of guy."

"That's kinda what I'm getting at. I like this guy. He's cool, and I don't think that you shoving your dick up his ass is gonna do him many favours. You fuck guys and then you're done with them. Don't do that to this kid. It'll ruin him."

"You think I don't know that, Puck." Kurt was getting frustrated with Puck not shutting up about Blaine. He didn't want to think about the other boy let alone talk about him. No matter what he was doing he always found himself thinking of Blaine. Something funny would happen and he'd find himself wanting to text Blaine about it. He'd walk past a clothing shop and see a bowtie and wonder if it would look good on Blaine or not. He even found himself itching to text Blaine about his Dad when he finally went to the meeting. No matter where he was or what he was doing, he was always thinking of Blaine, and he was sick of it. He chalked it up to not having a good fuck in weeks and Blaine was always around making him the perfect target.

"Oh my God, dude, it's more than that isn't it. You actually like him, don't you?" Puck jumped down from the desk looking so proud of himself. "You don't just wanna fuck him, you wanna be with him."

"I'm done listening to this crap. I need a smoke."

"Fine but we're not done here! Oh and when your finished we're going back to mine to set up."

Kurt walked up the stairs and went outside. He pulled a cigarette out and lit it up. He breathed in slowly and deeply and exhaled just as slow. He stood there wracking his brain for other guys that'd be at Puck's that night. He needed to get laid and then he'd stop thinking about Blaine. He had to stop thinking about him. Every time he thought about him or saw him his stomach instantly got queasy. He couldn't eat when he thought of Blaine and he could barely sleep. He didn't know what was wrong with him, maybe he was getting sick. What confused him the most is that it wasn't just about sex. He liked spending time with Blaine. He rarely got close to other people, Puck being the exception, but he didn't know if he _wanted_ to get close to Blaine. He felt exposed in front of that boy. He didn't want someone to make him weak. Most importantly, though, was that he couldn't let Blaine get hurt and simply being friends with Kurt immediately put someone in danger and he knew Blaine wouldn't be able to handle the things he didn't know about Kurt.

"What the hell are you doing Kurt?" Kurt looked at up his Dad's voice who was standing at the front door with his car keys in hand.

"Knitting a sweater, obviously." Kurt snapped back.

"Since when do you smoke? Those things will kill you Kurt." Burt was shaking his head in disbelief.

"Well what do you suggest? Drinking till I can't stand every night? At least this way I'll remember my shortened life. The way you're going you'll barely even remember that you have a son when you're lying on your death bed."

Burt's face was red and he looked in that moment that he was actually capable of murder. "I AM TRYING, KURT! I know I haven't been the perfect Father the last couple years but I am trying to do better, for you. And I am still your Dad and I will not allow you to talk to me like that again, you hear me?"

"I hear you, I just don't care." Kurt leant past his Dad and yelled out for Puck to come upstairs. "Let's go already, we need to go get supplies."

"Where the hell are you going, Kurt?"

Puck cautiously walked outside and between the Hummel men out to his car, not wanting to disturb the fight he could hear from downstairs.

"Out. Don't know when I'll be home so don't ask." He put on his helmet and straddled his bike and sped off with Puck following behind him.

* * *

It had been two days that Blaine and his Dad had been left alone together and not once had they spoken. He knew this was how it was going to be but that didn't mean he liked it. He had still hoped that his Dad would turn around and say sorry for the way he's treated Blaine but he knew that wasn't going to happen. He knew that his Dad would never accept who he is.

Saturday night could not have come quick enough. At least Anthony had a shift at the hospital on Saturday so Blaine didn't have to lock himself in his room all day. Most of his day was spent catching up on homework (which really wasn't that hard compared to Dalton), talking to Jeff and catching up on everything going on with the Warblers and, most importantly, figuring out what to wear to Puck's party.

Clothes were strewn all over his room. He had all of his jeans tossed onto his bed, shirts and jumpers carelessly thrown on the floor and bowties covering his desk. He had tried on almost every combination possible until he finally decided on red jeans, a plain black button up T-shirt and a red plaid bowtie. It was his first party and he wanted to dress to impress, and if he was trying to impress a certain someone then what was the big deal.

When everything was put back in his wardrobe and he was dressed with his hair gelled back, he jumped into his Prius and drove off. The closer to Puck's house he got, the more nervous he got. He knew it was ridiculous to be so nervous about going to a party but he also knew that most of his nerves were due to the fact that Kurt was going to be there, possibly drunk and even more dirty minded than normal. He'd already decided that he was just going to have one drink and that would be all for the night. He didn't want to get carried away.

From two streets away he could already hear the thumping of music and laughter from drunk teenagers. He parked his car around the corner because there wasn't much room left on Puck's street to park. He walked up to the house and passed two different couples making out on the front porch. When he opened the door his eyes went wide. There was a large group of people in the middle of the lounge room dancing together (more like grinding together, actually), people in the kitchen attempting to make cocktails which actually looked horrible, the couches in the corner of the room were filled with people making out with each other as was the staircase. He didn't even want to think about what was going on up there.

He started walking around looking for someone he knew. At first he found Finn and Rachel but they were busy making out on one of the couches, he also saw Mike and Tina who were dancing together but as most of the other people there, it was more so just grinding on one another. He walked through the large crowd of people until he heard someone yell out "Hey Hobbit!" He looked around till he saw Santana running up the stairs with Brittany, pinkies entwined. He waved back but didn't try yelling out to say hi, knowing they wouldn't be able to hear him anyway. After walking around the house a little longer without spotting someone he knew, he decided to try out the backyard. Outside there were just as many people as there were inside, if not more. He knew why this was the party of the year. It looked like almost half the school was there. There was a large crowd of people playing beer pong and he quickly realised that was where the rest of the New Directions were. He made his way over but stopped suddenly when he noticed Kurt.

He was wearing Blaine's favourite pair of maroon, ripped skinny jeans that had to have been painted on. His ass in them looked absolutely edible. His eyes trailed up and watched as Kurt took off his black leather jacket that revealed the plain white tee underneath. From behind, Blaine could see how the shirt hugged every muscle and left nothing to the imagination. It was no different to what the boy normally wore but for some reason, Blaine couldn't keep his eyes off him tonight. Maybe it was to do with the fact that he's never really stood back and just looked at Kurt, especially from this angle. Kurt stood next to Puck, cheering him on as he threw the ball right into Sam's last cup. Kurt threw his arms in the air in triumph and turned to Puck who instantly grabbed him and lifted him off the ground in a massive hug. It was when Puck put Kurt down that he finally noticed Blaine standing there staring at him.

"Hey there gorgeous!" Kurt greeted him with as he sauntered over and wrapped his arms around Blaine's waist. His heart rate may have sped up a little.

"Hey yourself. This party is massive!" Blaine grinned up at him as Kurt started to laugh a little.

"I know, it's like this every year. You want a drink?"

"Yeah sure, just one though. I'm driving." Kurt took Blaine's hand and led him back into the house. They walked into the kitchen and Kurt grabbed him a red cup and poured him a beer and began to walk back outside.

"Aren't you having one Kurt?" Blaine asked him.

Kurt looked at Blaine for a moment and then spoke softly. "I don't drink." He looked away and then started walking back outside. Blaine could tell that Kurt wasn't annoyed with him for asking but he also knew that Kurt didn't want to answer any more questions.

He followed Kurt back outside and was pulled into a hug by Sam.

"Dude, what's up?"

Blaine smiled at his friend who was rocking forward and backwards a little, obviously starting to feel the effects of the alcohol.

"Hey Sam. You look like you're about to fall over." Blaine laughed up at him.

"Best thing about moving to here from Dalton are the parties man. Trust me, you're gonna have the night of your life!"

* * *

Kurt hadn't been able to keep his eyes off Blaine since he walked in. Somehow he made the geeky clothes look completely hot, Kurt still had no idea how but it only frustrated him more. He couldn't be thinking of Blaine like that. He knew what it would lead to and that was something he would not risk. He turned to Puck who was already looking back at him.

"Don't forget what we talked about earlier Hummel. You can't just sleep with him, it'll destroy him."

"I know Puck. Which is why I need to find someone to fuck, so if you'll excuse me." Kurt walked off and headed inside. When he walked into the lounge room he felt someone grab his hand. He turned around and was met by Blaine and those stupid hazel eyes that made him want to melt and his stupid hair that had way too much gel but somehow still suited him perfectly and of course his stupid intoxicating smile that had Kurt forgetting that he was trying to keep his distance.

"What do you want Blaine?" Kurt knew he needed to get away from this boy but he made it increasingly harder by being so damn cute.

"Dance with me!" Blaine practically yelled at him.

Kurt tried to force his smile away but he knew that Blaine saw right through it. It scared him to death.

"I can't Blaine. I need to find someone."

"But Kurt, I love this song!" Blaine gave him these big puppy dog eyes and Kurt instantly knew that there was no way he was going to let up.

"Fine. One dance and that's it."

They moved into the middle of the crowd and were forced right up together because of it. Kurt put his hands on Blaine's waist while Blaine wrapped his arms around Kurt's neck. They started off slowly at first, just swaying a little to the beat but after a while the both grew a little more confident and started dancing closer together. The crowd was constantly pushing them closer closer closer, to the point that they could barely move. Soon enough they were practically grinding against one another just like everyone else who was there. Kurt knew it was a bad idea to be so close to Blaine but he couldn't help it. Every time he tried to get a little distance Blaine would somehow pull him right back in again.

They were watching each other intently, their breathing becoming ragged and their faces started drifting closer together. They were nose to nose and Kurt could feel Blaine's breath on his own parted lips. He looked down at Blaine's lips just as he licked him from being suddenly dry. Kurt knew it was a bad idea but slowly they both started to lean in, barely even moving anymore, until Kurt noticed someone from the corner of his eye.

"Fuck." He let go of Blaine who was now standing in the middle of the room with a dazed expression on his face. Kurt ran outside over to Puck who was trying to get with one of the cheerleaders.

"Puck. What the fuck is Kyle doing here?" Puck looked up at the sound of Kurt's voice with a confused expression.

"Kyle? I obviously didn't invite him. He's possibly working, what's the big deal?" Puck then went back to whatever girl he was failing at picking up, ignoring Kurt completely.

Kurt walked back inside, straight past Blaine who had obviously followed him back out. He went inside and after scanning the room, found who he was looking for.

"Kyle. What the hell are you doing here?" Kurt grabbed the taller man and pulled him into the corner of the kitchen.

"There you are Kurt, just the guy I was looking for. Boss sent me here, told me to give you this. You're working tonight." He handed Kurt a small package who quickly shoved it into his pocket.

"I told you I am done with this!" I'm out. You can go and tell _your_ boss that." Kurt was fuming at this point but he was also starting to worry a little. He couldn't get caught talking to Kyle by any of his friends, especially Puck.

"I can't tell him that Kurt," Kyle practically yelled at him before lowering his voice again. "You know what he'll do to you if you don't come back with the money. You saw what happened to Jimmy last month."

Kurt knew exactly what he was talking about. This is the exact reason he needs to stay away from Blaine. He can't let Blaine get hurt. He can't let his Dad get hurt. He can't let anyone get hurt.

"Fine. I'll do it."

"Good. He wants the money by tomorrow night." Kyle turned around and walked straight out the front door without a second glance back.

Kurt knew who he had to look for to give him the money he needed and he knew exactly where he'd find him.

He went straight to the stairs but was met by Blaine.

"Kurt, who was that?" Blaine spoke in such a small voice that it almost killed Kurt knowing what he was about to do to this boy.

"No one Blaine. Don't worry about it." Kurt tried pushing past him but Blaine wasn't having any of that.

"Don't tell me not to worry Kurt!" Blaine yelled at him. "I have been worrying about you ever since that night I found you. You miss a day at school and I can only imagine what you're out doing. I'm not stupid. I know that was the same guy from the other night. He scares you, I can see it. Just let me help you."

"I don't want your fucking help Blaine!" Kurt yelled back. He could see that some people, including some of their friends, were watching them with curious eyes but he couldn't care about that right now. "Don't you get it? I don't need you around! You're hot as fuck and that's all you ever were to me. A challenge. I knew you wouldn't give it up easily which made the chase all that much more fun."

Blaine's face almost broke Kurt's heart. He didn't mean anything that he was saying but he knew this was the only way to keep him safe.

"Kurt. You don't mean that." Blaine's face was pleading and it took all of Kurt's strength not to let his own tears fall.

"Do you seriously think I invited you here tonight so that you could have fun with your friends? I knew you'd never let me fuck you sober so I convinced you to come here but now I'm done wasting my time with you." Kurt turned around and went straight up the stairs before he could see Blaine's reaction. He didn't want to have to hurt the boy but he knew there was nothing else he could possibly do to get him away. Away from Kurt was safe and that's what he needed for Blaine, for him to be safe.

Kurt walked towards the bathroom which was of course locked. He banged on the door yelling to be let in. Eventually it was opened up by the person he was looking for.

"Hummel, wanting to join us again now are we?" Grant was McKinley's biggest druggie and everyone knew it. Every party he'd be locked away in the bathroom doing whatever it was that he could get his hands on for that weekend. How he was still in school Kurt had no idea, but he didn't care about that. He knew that Grant would buy everything Kyle had given him. He grabbed Grant and led him into Puck's bedroom, thankfully it was unoccupied.

"Oh, so you're after a private party. Well as long as no one finds out-" Grant tried to grab at Kurt to kiss him who instantly pushed him back making him stumble onto the bed.

"Fuck off Grant. I'm not here for that." Kurt really couldn't believe that Grant used to be one of his regular fucks. He must have been really screwed back then. "How much do you have on you?"

"Right now, uh $450. Why, what have you got for me?"

"Two grams of ecstasy for everything you've got on you now. Take it or leave it."

Kurt grabbed the bag out of his pocket and showed Grant the pills he was given to prove he had it.

"$400."

"$450 or nothing."

They stared at each other for a moment. Kurt knew he was going to crack, he always does.

"Fine, $450. You're lucky your shit's good Hummel." Grant handed over the money, waited for Kurt to count it who then handed over the pills.

"Nice doing business with you Hummel, as always." And then Grant was back out the door.

Kurt breathed out a long breath and then collapsed onto Pucks bed. Before he even had a chance to think about everything that had happened, his best friend slammed the door open.

"What the fuck were you doing with Grant, Kurt." Puck started yelling at him. "Please tell me you were fucking him because if you even think about touching another drug again in your life I swear to God I'll-"

"Shut up, it wasn't like that Puck. I came in here to get away from Blaine and he followed me in wanting a fuck but I told him to piss off." Kurt hated having to lie to Puck but he knew it was for the best. He'd told Puck months ago that he'd stopped dealing just to stop him from worrying. He knew that Puck would try and take matters into his own hands if he found out Kurt hadn't been able to get out of it all and he couldn't risk that.

"Yeah that's the other thing. What the hell was that down there with Blaine. He looks like he was just told his parents died or something Kurt. Why did you say that shit to him man, none of its true and we both know it." Puck went and lay on his bed beside Kurt, no longer yelling but just talking instead. "You like him Kurt and you had no reason to do that to him."

Kurt was silent for a moment. He'd been thinking all day about what Puck had said earlier that morning about him actually liking Blaine. He didn't want to. He really didn't want to, but he couldn't deny what was right in front of him any longer. He shared things with Blaine that no one else knows about him. He likes spending time with Blaine. Yeah he thinks that Blaine is absolutely gorgeous and he's never wanted a guy more than he does Blaine but what he likes about Blaine isn't that he's good looking. It's everything else. It's the way he doesn't judge Kurt on his appearance or simply see him as someone to sleep with. It's the way that Blaine sees Kurt for who he is and still wants to spend time with him. It's the way he looks at Kurt with such adoration in his eyes that Kurt can only get lost in them. It's the way that Blaine makes Kurt feel like he might be good enough for once. It's the way that he trusts Kurt like it's second nature. So maybe Kurt likes Blaine and that scares him to death, but he knows that he could never have Blaine. He knows that Blaine could do better.

"He'd be better off without me." Kurt then stood up and walked out of his best friends room.

He went downstairs and outside to get some fresh air when he noticed Blaine and Sam not too far from him.

"Come on Blaine, you've had enough. Just give me the bottle." Sam tried grabbing a bottle of vodka that Blaine was currently drinking. Already halfway empty. Kurt wanted so badly to go and help Blaine. To just hold him in his arms and never let him go but he couldn't. His legs wouldn't move and he was stuck in that one spot, not being able to do anything but watch the boy he was falling for try and drink away the pain that he had caused him.

"Piss off Sam. Just leave me alone." Blaine turned around and spotted Kurt sitting there. He walked over to Kurt, stumbling a little and tried to grab his car keys out of his pocket.

He stopped for a moment when he reached Kurt and looked at him with disgust. "Screw you, Kurt." He then continued on inside and Kurt watched as Blaine walked through the house and opened the front door. That's when Kurt realised what he was doing.

"BLAINE!" Kurt ran after him, through the house and out the front door. He looked down the street and saw Blaine walking, car keys in one hand and bottle of vodka in the other. Kurt ran after him without even thinking about it.

"BLAINE!" Kurt reached him as Blaine turned around to face him.

"Go 'way Kurt. I'm go-going home." Blaine then turned the corner and walked over to his car.

"Are you an idiot Blaine? There is no way you're driving like this." Kurt swiftly snatched the keys out of Blaine's hand and unlocked the door. "Come on, I'm driving you home."

He tried to help Blaine into the passenger's seat but was swatted away like he was some sort of bug Blaine was trying to get rid of. He walked around and climbed into the driver's seat, started the car and drove away.

The ride back to Blaine's house was silent and tense. Neither of them spoke a word and every time Kurt looked over at Blaine, he was looking out the window with a blank expression on his face. Kurt hated himself for what he was doing to him. He didn't want to hurt him but he knew he couldn't stay close to him anymore. It wasn't safe and that's all he wanted for Blaine, for him to be safe. He knew it was going to absolutely kill him not being able to talk to him every day, to have to see Blaine but not be able to have anything to do with him. Maybe one day he could explain everything and maybe Blaine would understand and forgive him but there was no way he could forgive himself, how could he ever even think that maybe Blaine would forgive him?

They arrived at Blaine's house and they got out of the car and Kurt handed his keys back.

"Blaine I-"

"Don't Kurt. Just don't." Blaine spoke in such a small and defeated voice that it brought tears to Kurt's eyes, he then walked away and after a little fumbling around unlocked the front door and disappeared inside.

Kurt turned around and started walking. It was a good hour or so walk back to Puck's from here but he was thankful for the silence and cool air. He wanted to be alone. It seemed that no matter what happened or who came along the universe wanted him to be alone and miserable and he was finally starting to accept that maybe that's all he deserved.


	7. Chapter 7

**Warning: Mentions of self-harm**

Blaine woke up with a massive pounding in his head. After blinking a few times to try and focus he found that the room was spinning and it was making him dizzy. He sat up, too quickly in his opinion, to see staring across at him from his desk was an almost empty bottle of vodka. He didn't even remember getting home. He fumbled around looking for his phone to call Kurt to make sure he did get a lift and didn't drive, but that's when he remembered.

He let his phone drop to his bed and slowly lay back down.

Kurt had yelled at him. Kurt had proved every fear he had ever had about the boy. He knew that when they first met all Kurt wanted was to sleep with him but he had actually started to think that they were friends. He'd put his faith in Kurt and he'd trusted him and he'd so stupidly thought that Kurt had trusted him back.

All of a sudden he felt his stomach lurch and he immediately ran to the bathroom. He was in there throwing up everything from the night before for a good twenty minutes but the disgusting feeling of being sick was nothing to everything else he was feeling. He lay down on the cold tiled floor and stared blankly at the wall.

Kurt was his best friend at McKinley and he'd betrayed him in the worst way possible. The worst part of all, Blaine thought, was that he had finally let himself think that maybe there could be something more. Dancing with Kurt he had never felt so close to someone before, not just physically but emotionally as well. In that moment he had thought that maybe they could be something more. In that moment he had finally admitted to himself how much he liked Kurt. Most people would look at Kurt and just see the bad boy appeal but Blaine could see so much more than that. Blaine could see that despite what everyone saw, Kurt had a soft side to him, a side that he would only show to few people. Kurt was rough around the edges which was exciting but he was also so gentle that it left Blaine wondering how he could be real. When they'd first met, Kurt was always so stern and possessive in the way he held Blaine close to his side but gradually they turned into soft caresses and tender arms, curling around his waist instinctively.

He made Blaine feel special but now all he could think was that maybe that was how he treated every guy. Get them to trust him, fall for him and then screw them and take everything they had felt away. He's a selfish jerk and as much as Blaine wanted to hit him he also couldn't deny the fact that he was still upset that they never got the chance to kiss again.

After a good half hour of laying on the floor in the bathroom he finally took a shower to get rid of the smell of alcohol and smoke and went downstairs to face the day. He walked into the kitchen and started to pour some coffee his Dad must have already made up when a voice behind him made him jump.

"Have fun last night, Blaine?" Anthony was sitting at the kitchen table, nursing a coffee mug in one hand and flicking through the newspaper with the other. He didn't look at Blaine as he spoke but looked up when he hadn't responded.

"Why do you care?" Blaine turned his back to his Dad and started drinking his coffee, enjoying the taste on his lips and the soothing heat trickle down his throat. He wanted to forget last night and he wanted to not have to stand here and listen to what reason his Dad has for finally wanting to talk to him.

"I care Blaine because I got home after work last night only to find you not here. Then an hour later you stumble inside, drunk, after driving! Are you insane! You could have gotten yourself killed or killed someone else all because you-" Blaine hadn't heard his Dad yell like this since the time he was seven and Cooper was fourteen and Cooper had been caught skipping school and taking Blaine with him so they could go bowling together. They had been in so much trouble but it was also the best day they ever had together.

Granted Blaine didn't remember how he got home the night before but he also couldn't believe that this is why his Dad suddenly had an interest in him. He guessed that any chance his father got to yell at him and make him feel even more worthless about himself he'd take. He was still yelling in the background but Blaine had tuned him out. He'd stopped caring. About his Dad, about Kurt, about anyone. Caring only ever got him hurt and he wasn't willing to put himself through that again. He drank the last of his coffee and washed out his mug before walking out of the kitchen and back up to his room. He felt his Dad follow behind him and could still hear him yelling but he barely noticed. He walked into his room and shut the door behind him. The last thing he saw was his Dad's shocked face. He would have slammed it shut to try and get his father even angrier but he didn't have the energy. He was sick of trying for people who obviously wanted nothing to do with him.

He shut all his blinds, turned off any lights in him room, even unplugged his alarm clock to get rid of the bright green numbers, and crawled back into bed. He turned his phone off and pulled the blanket up over his head to block out the world around him. When he closed his eyes to try and sleep all he could hear were voices. Voices taunting him, reminding him of all his fears. Voices from almost two years ago shouting words that he had tried to diminish but knew that they were true.

_Idiot._

_Faggot. _

_Pussy. _

_Weak. _

_Coward. _

_Worthless._

These words that he had tried so hard to forget were now back to haunt him except this time it was worse because now he could also hear the angelic voice of someone he thought actually cared about him, someone who let him believe that all these words meant nothing, that same someone who had then proven just how accurate these words are.

He could hear Kurt's voice so clearly repeating words from last night. _I don't need you around. I'm done wasting my time with you._ These phrases repeated themselves over and over like a mantra in his head. Not allowing him to forget what he was really worth. He finally let sleep take over him which allowed him to forget, even if it was just for a moment.

* * *

On Monday morning Blaine got ready for school in a sort of trance. Everything he did was mechanical. He didn't put in any effort at all. His hair was gelled because that was part of the routine, not because he desperately wanted it styled. The clothes he wore were possibly the plainest items he owned. Black jeans and a plain white polo, he didn't even consider a bowtie. He walked downstairs, expecting his Dad to try and stop him so they could talk but instead he was greeted by his Mum.

"Blaine, what the hell happened this weekend I can't believe you-"

Blaine had completely forgotten that his Mum was due home that morning. He didn't think he'd see her till after he got home from school that night. He knew he should ask about how meeting with the editor went, it was the polite thing to do after all but instead he walked straight past her, giving her a mumbled "Morning" before walking out the front door.

When he arrived at school he was bombarded by his friends at his locker. He could hear them all, asking if he was okay, asking what happened between him and Blaine, but he wasn't listening. He could feel someone by his side, Sam possibly, but he didn't do anything to acknowledge their presence. He got his books out of his locker and walked away towards his first class, not even noticing the worried looks on his friends faces.

He walked into English and of course Kurt was there in the back corner, head down and fast asleep. He walked into the room quietly, not realising that he'd gotten there early, as not to draw attention to himself. As he pulled his chair out it scraped against the floor, making Blaine wince slightly and Kurt to suddenly raise his head. They stared at each other for a while. They could practically see the tension rising between them both. Blaine was the first to look away. He sat down in his seat and grabbed his books from his bag that he needed. He didn't hear a word their teacher said all class. He hadn't even bothered to open his books at all, knowing he wasn't going to write anything down anyway. Instead all he could focus on was the feeling of being watched again. It was the same as his first week at McKinley when he could always feel someone's eyes on him. _Kurt's eyes_. He could feel Kurt watching him all class but he didn't dare turn around. He didn't want to have to look at the other boy.

Blaine is the first person to walk out of the class room when the bell goes off but he doesn't reach his second class. Instead he finds himself walking aimlessly around the school before reaching the choir room. He sits down at the piano and lifts the lid up. Lightly with his fingers, her traces over the keys in front of him before pressing down. At first he's hitting random keys, not really paying any attention to what he's playing but slowly it turns into a melody. It's almost painful to listen to it's so sad. It's a soft sadness, like the wilting of a flower but it eventually turns darker. It's the sound of misery, complete and utter melancholy. He continues to play what he feels. It sounds like a hurricane. A mixture of emotions all crashing down at once causing such a beautiful catastrophe. Anger, hurt, despair, all crashing down around him causing him to play the most tragic piece of music he's ever heard. He doesn't cry though, not through tears but instead he cries through his music. Everything he feels he can't express himself so he does so through song. Eventually he finds that the hurricane has stopped and all he's left with is the damage the hurricane has caused. Devastation fills him, through his mind, down his body and into his chest. It seeps into his heart and falls out through his blood stream. It fills his body, making him ache all over, eventually reaching the tips of his fingers and then he hears it, too. He listens as the loud crashing suddenly comes to a halt and pain fills his ears. It's soft but powerful. It's everything he feels in music and it makes him feel so overwhelmed that he can't help but stop suddenly. His sits there, alone, in the middle of the choir room.

The eerie silence he hears causes a shudder to run through his body. Despite the layers he's wearing he's unexplainably cold and can't stop shivering. He decides not to go to the rest of his classes for the day, knowing he won't be paying any attention anyway, so he picks up his bag and walks out of the class room.

* * *

Kurt arrived at physics to find that Blaine, yet again, wasn't in class. He hadn't been in any of their shared classes since that morning and apparently he wasn't seen at lunch either. Kurt knew it wasn't like Blaine to skip school, no matter what the circumstances. He knew that he'd hurt the boy, they were friends after all, but wasn't this a bit of an overreaction? He had all of yesterday to get over it, it wasn't like they were anything more, Blaine had made sure about that. That's what confused Kurt the most, he'd pushed him away the night they'd kissed so obviously Kurt didn't mean _that_ much to him.

He sat down in his normal seat next to Puck who was still obviously ignoring him. Puck had made a point of not speaking to Kurt since Saturday night. He had said that Kurt had _'hurt his boy Blaine'_, when Blaine had become one of Puck's _'boys' _Kurt had no idea, either way the two friends weren't talking but Kurt knew he'd come around soon.

After class the boys all walked to glee together. Sam and Finn were talking about something quietly to themselves so Kurt took the opportunity to try and get Puck to talk to him again. He'd just pushed away one of his best friends, he didn't want to push away another one.

"So how long are you ignoring me for this time?"

All he got in response was an over exaggerated huff while Puck crossed his arms in front of him.

"Because you know you never last more than a few days."

Again nothing. Kurt couldn't help but smirk at his friend's attempted efforts.

"You always get really excited about something that you would never dare breath a word to anyone but me and end up giving in anyway."

Puck amazingly kept quiet but Kurt didn't miss the twitch of his lips.

"Besides, it's classic rock week this week and I know you're dying to rock out to a bit of AC/DC with me."

"I hate you Hummel."

A smile broke out onto Kurt's face, knowing that Puck wasn't actually angry at him. At least someone wasn't.

"That drunken blowjob you gave me last year says otherwise." Kurt reminded him with a wink.

"Fuck, Kurt. Shut up. You promised me you'd never bring that up again."

"Sorry." Even though he really wasn't.

They walked the rest of the way to the choir room in comfortable silence while Sam and Finn continued whispering to each other, too engrossed in their own conversation to listen to anything Kurt and Puck were talking about.

Kurt went to walk into the room when Puck pulled him back instead.

"Why'd you do that Kurt?"

Kurt could tell that Puck was being serious now. Even though Puck and Blaine had never spent too much time alone, Puck had taken an immediate liking to him. Why though, Kurt had no idea.

"I told you Puck, Blaine is better off without me in his life."

"But I thought you said you actually like the kid, it wasn't just a fuck?"

"I did like him! _Do_ like him." Kurt added with a small voice.

"Well that's what I don't get. Why'd you push him away then?"

"I told you Puck, he would be so much better off without me!" Kurt really didn't want to get into this with Puck so he started to walk back into the choir room until Puck grabbed his arm again and pulled him back out.

"That's what I don't get! He looks at you like you're the fucking sun Kurt. I know you think that only bad things happen to you and yeah, you've had to deal with a lot of shit in your life already but is it really that hard to believe that something good could happen to you for once in your life?"

After Puck finished talking and Kurt didn't say anything, he walked inside and left Kurt standing in the hallway alone.

He knew that everything Puck had said was right, but he couldn't tell Puck that he was still dealing and that was why Kyle was at his party the other night. He doesn't even blame Kyle really. It's their boss, Hugo. There was no way that Hugo would just let Kurt go. Kurt had worked for him for a year and had brought in more money than anyone else who worked for him. There was no way he was going to make it out that easy. This is exactly why he can't be around Blaine anymore. Kurt needs to get out but he knows that Hugo will go to any length possible to make sure that doesn't happen. That includes hurting the people around him. Hid Dad, Puck, Finn and Blaine. He thought he had gotten out a few months ago. Puck had been so happy, seeing as he'd been so worried about Kurt the entire time. He knew that telling Puck would get him upset and angry and there'd be no telling what he'd do. He couldn't let anyone get hurt.

After taking a moment to gather himself, he walked into the choir room and found Sam standing at the front of the room talking to everyone. The whole room looked equal parts shocked and sad. Rachel had tears in her eyes though that wasn't anything surprising. What was surprising was that it looked like Sam also had tears in his eyes. As soon as Kurt was noticed everyone else turned to look at him and Sam stopped talking suddenly. Everything after that happened in a blur.

Before he knows it, Sam is charging at Kurt and holding him up against the wall by the collar of his shirt while Puck is trying to get him to let go. Sam keeps yelling things at Kurt that he doesn't fully understand but has a pretty good idea of what it's about.

"WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT TO HIM! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS MEANS!"

Kurt's pretty sure that he hears Rachel scream somewhere in the distance. He isn't scared of Sam Evans of all people but the fury in his eyes is the only thing keeping Kurt from punching the blonde. Sam is still yelling at him and now Mike is also trying to get him off Kurt. Everyone else is standing around, closely watching with shocked faces and he can't help but notice that Blaine is the only one missing.

After a few minutes of all this happening, Mr Schue walks into the room and quickly runs over to Sam and pulls him away from Kurt.

"What the hell is going on here?"

Everyone is looking between Mr Schue, Kurt and Sam but not saying anything. Frankly Kurt would like the answer to that too but it doesn't look like he'll be getting one anytime soon.

"Screw this. I'm outta here." Sam announces before walking out of the room.

Mr Schue asks the group to sit down and then asks for someone to explain what had just happened. Tina is the first to talk up.

"Kurt and Blaine had a fight on the weekend, I don't think anyone really knows what it was about but we got to school this morning and Blaine was acting really weird. He wouldn't talk to anyone and just walked off on us all. Then on my way to second period I walked past the choir room and he was in here playing the piano. It was so sad Mr Schue, I've never heard anything like it. When we all got here about ten minutes ago Sam asked us all if we know anything that had happened and I told him what I saw and he kinda freaked out. I've never seen him like that. He started crying and told us that last time Blaine was like this it was because of something really bad but he didn't tell us what it was. Then when Kurt walked in he just attacked him and went crazy. That's when you walked in."

Everyone was silent after Tina had stopped talking and after a moment all looked over at Kurt, expecting him to say something. Mr Schue decided to be the first to speak up.

"Kurt, maybe you should try and sort things out with Blaine? Clear the air a little."

Kurt looked around at everyone and could see all of their accusing eyes on him. He knew that most of the people in this room didn't like him already and they possibly hated him now after what he did to Blaine.

"Shouldn't you all be happy now? I know that you guys hated that we were so close, you all thought I was just trying to get into his pants. Well you got what you wanted. I'm staying away from him and now there's no chance that he'll want to be anywhere near me, so congratulations, you all got what you wanted." He turned back around in his seat and looked over at Puck who at least wasn't looking like he wanted to hit him anymore. Now, instead, he looked conflicted. Like he wanted to see where Kurt was coming from but also couldn't stop seeing the hurt in Blaine's eyes.

"Kurt," Rachel said quietly. She looked around, looking a bit shaken up and then stood and walked in front of him. "At first I admit we all didn't like you being friends with him, we thought you were going to hurt him but then we saw how happy he was around you so we gave you the benefit of the doubt. I don't know what happened on Saturday night but I don't think you do either, not really. You don't see that you did hurt him, whether or not you meant to, that's what happened."

Kurt looked around at everyone in the room and couldn't believe what he was seeing. All of these people who barely even knew Blaine were all acting like they were his best friends. They didn't know Blaine, not like he did. He understood if Puck, Sam and Finn were angry with him because they were at least Blaine's friends but everyone else here didn't know him. They were looking for another excuse to not like him, just like they always did. He's never cared before but the idea of them suddenly treating Blaine like he's a part of their so called 'family' when none of them have ever even tried to get to know him to try and make themselves feel like they're good people is an all-time low.

"Fuck it, I'm out. And I'm not coming back to this stupid club again either." Kurt stood up and walked out of the choir room without a second glance back.

* * *

Puck watched as his best friend walked out of the choir room. He knew there was something else going on with Kurt that he wasn't saying. He was sure it had something to do with Kyle but he got out of dealing ages ago. There was no way he was back there again but something was definitely going on and Puck was gonna find out what. He knew that if everything was alright he wouldn't have yelled at Blaine that the other night.

He watched as Rachel went and silently sat down next to Finn and rested her head on his shoulder. Everyone in the room seemed as lost as each other including Mr Schue who didn't know how to handle the situation. He decided it was time to stand up for his best friend and say something, even if he didn't fully agree with everything he was doing at the moment. He stood up and walked to the front of the room.

"You guys talk a good game about everyone here being family through good and bad but when have any of you ever stood up for Kurt? He has been through more in the last few years than you will all go through in your entire lives. Look, none of us know what happened on Saturday night, including me, and yeah I was angry at Hummel too but for all we know he did nothing wrong. It could have all been Blaine's fault but instead of actually acting like the family we're all supposed to be, you've used this as another excuse to gang up against Kurt, someone who has been a part of our lives for the last two years that we have sat in this room, to defend a guy that you've known for about two months. A guy that practically none of you have tried to get to know, by the way. Now I'm not saying that you all need to believe that this was Blaine's fault and not Kurt's, but just give the guy a break. Butt out of their shit and let them sort it out on their own." He ran out after his rant and went to find Sam.

After searching the school and finding it empty, he went out to the parking lot to find if he'd gone home. Instead he found Sam sitting in his car on the phone. He walked over to his friend and tried to open the passenger door but found it was locked. Sam turned his head and kept his eyes on him. After a few moments he hung up the phone and unlocked the car door, letting Puck inside.

They were silent for a while and Puck watched as every now and then another tear would stream down Sam's face but he'd make no move to wipe it away. Puck was uncomfortable to say the least. Yeah he and Sam were good friends but they'd never been in a situation like this before. He didn't know how to act around him. He knew exactly what to do if it was Kurt and even Finn was easier to deal with, though he'd never go to Puck anyway, but he didn't know what to do with Sam. But this was about his best friend Kurt and his boy Blaine so he told himself to just suck it up and wait for Sam to speak.

"None of you understand what this means man." Sam said as he leant his head against the steering wheel, shaking it slightly from side to side.

"I'm worried about him but none of those people in there are close enough with him that he'd want them knowing anything. They don't deserve to know, not yet anyway. He needs help from his friends and the only people who really know him here are you, me, Finn and of course Kurt. Obviously Kurt isn't going to be much help and Finn wouldn't be able to handle the situation, but I can't go through this by myself and I don't trust anyone else enough Puck." He looked at Puck with so much desperation in his eyes that Puck promised himself in that moment that he'd do whatever he needed to help Blaine and to lift some of the weight off of Sam's shoulders.

He didn't say anything, he just nodded, indicating to Sam to continue talking.

"He transferred to Dalton just after winter break, our sophomore year. When he first transferred he didn't board so we only saw him during school hours, though we didn't even see much of him then. He and I shared most of the same classes and I noticed after the first couple of weeks how lonely he was, so I thought I'd try and make him feel welcome. I started sitting with him in classes and tried talking to him but he barely ever responded and when he did, they'd be one word answers at most. I could tell something was really wrong with the kid but I had no idea what. At first I thought he was just having a hard time transferring in the middle of the year but I think there was always a part of me that knew it was worse than that." He wiped a stray tear from his face and dug the palms of his hands into his eyes, obviously wanting the tears to stop.

"So many of the boys who boarded at Dalton where there for a reason, not just because it's a good school, so after hearing stories from some of the other boys there I could only imagine would Blaine had gone through. After a month of going to school there he started boarding there as well. He shared a dorm with my friend, Jeff, you might have met him a couple weeks ago when he came to the school to visit Blaine. Anyway I kept hanging out with him during classes just to try and make him feel like he had at least one friend, even if we never spoke that often. After he started boarding though he stopped talking to me completely. I'd ask him a question and he wouldn't answer, when normally he'd at least do that. He started making sure that I couldn't sit near him in classes and he just kept completely to himself. Jeff told me that he'd never heard Blaine speak before, didn't know what his voice even sounded like. He said that as soon as he would get back after classes he'd go straight to bed and do nothing else till the next morning when he'd get up for school again. He didn't eat at any time of the day apart from lunchtime, he was behind in all his classes because he wouldn't do any of the homework but the teachers all seemed to be giving him a lot of slack for some reason.

One day, a bit over a week after he'd started boarding, I was walking to the bathroom, past the senior commons where they held Warbler rehearsals and heard someone playing the piano. The door was opened a little and so I peeked in to find Blaine sitting there playing. Just like Tina said it was the saddest thing I had ever heard in my life. You know in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban how they said that dementors make you feel like that you'd never be happy again? That's what I felt like hearing him play. It was horrible and I couldn't keep listening. I decided that that night I'd go to his dorm room and tell him that he had me to talk to if he wanted. Up till that point I had never pushed him to talk or be friends or anything, it was always at his own pace. I thought that maybe he needed the push now though, so I decided that that's what I was going to do." Sam put his hands on the steering wheel when all of a sudden he started sobbing. His face was covered in tears and Puck had no idea what to do. He knew that Sam had more to say and that the worst was coming but he didn't know if he really wanted to hear it.

"After classes I went up to his room, knowing that Jeff was with another friend at the time. I knocked on the door but no one answered. Most of the boys kept their doors unlocked most of the time so I tried the handle and it opened. Blaine mustn't have heard me knock because I walked in there he was sitting there holding a knife. He wasn't doing anything with it, wasn't hurting himself but the way he was looking at it was like he was contemplating something. He had barely even noticed that I was there. I didn't know what to do so I just stood there and he looked up at me slowly and I could just tell. He'd given up. He didn't care anymore and I'm guessing he thought no one else did either. He looked back down at the knife and was just sitting there in front of me playing with it. I walked over to him and slowly took it out of his hand. He didn't even try to stop me really. I put it on the other side of the room and sat down and hugged him. It was the first time we'd even touched and I could feel him tense up a little but he finally relaxed. He didn't hug me back or anything. I think he was in shock because I was the one crying. I didn't even really know why I was crying to be honest. Maybe I was in shock? I had guessed things were bad but I didn't know they were that bad. I will never know what he was thinking in that moment but I can only imagine the worst."

Puck couldn't believe what he was hearing. Blaine was such a happy person. He was almost in tears himself listening to the story about someone who was becoming one of his closest friends. He knew that he had to do something to help. He didn't really believe that there was anything he could do to help Blaine, this was way too deep to be fixed by just his friends. He obviously needed therapy or something. But if helping Sam get through this was the least he could do then that is what he'd do. He knew he wasn't an affectionate person but he put his hand on Sam's shoulder and patted it lightly, hoping it was some sort of comfort to him.

"I don't know how long I sat there holding him but eventually after what felt like hours I called Jeff and told him to come and keep an eye on Blaine. I took the knife when he got there and went to the principal. She called his parents and he wasn't at school for a while. When he finally did come back he approached me before I had the chance to. He had never tried to be the first to interact with me, or anyone else for that matter, so it was a surprise that's for sure. He thanked me for being so nice to him when he first moved there and for walking in on him that day. He never told me what he was doing that night and I never dared to ask, it wasn't my place. He started hanging out with my group of friends but he kept his distance from me. I think maybe he felt a bit weird being around me at first because I was the one to find him that day but we did become close, eventually. He started talking more and he became really close with Jeff at first. After a few months you could see the difference in him. He still had his moments but he was beginning to be happy again, you know?"

Sam had started to settle down a little more now which Puck was thankful for. He wasn't crying anymore but he was still shaking a bit.

"Fuck man I am so scared and I don't know what to do. I'm not going to tell you what happened but he went through a lot before he went to Dalton that made him stop caring and I guess that whatever happened with Kurt has started to make him think like that again or something. I don't know really. Everything that happened at Dalton is no secret Puck. Everyone knew. He doesn't ever bring it up himself but if he was ever asked a question he'd answer honestly. I mean he didn't really do anything but it's still pretty heavy. Only Jeff and I know why he was so distant and closed off but I don't know why this time. I know that I need to do something about it though. I can't let him go through this by himself again."

Sam opened the car door and got out suddenly, slamming it behind him. He started pacing back and forth in front of the vehicle taking deep breaths of the cool, fresh air. Puck got out of the car as well but just stood there with his hands in his pockets. He had no idea how to act. This is where girls were needed. They knew how to deal with this crap, Puck didn't. He didn't know if he should be saying something or if he should be trying to calm Sam down or what. So he stood there, and let Sam have his space until suddenly he was standing right in front of Puck and speaking up again.

"I've seen him have bad days before. He closes in on himself, doesn't really interact much and just does what he has to. But he at least tries. You can see it. He still sits with his friends even if you can tell he doesn't want to be there. He'll at least say yes at first to going out or catching up or whatever but he usually cancels anyway. This though, this isn't just a bad day. He's the exact same as when I first met him. At first I thought that maybe I was being paranoid and overprotective or something, that was until Tina told me that she heard him playing. That music, it's dark, like really dark, and he's only ever played like that once before and that was how I knew that things must be really bad again. I don't blame Kurt completely, there has to be something else going on, but Kurt is the person who pushed him over the edge and that is not something I can get over. I know he's your best friend but I really hate him right now. I wanna hurt him so badly, Puck, you have no idea."

Sam's face had gone red the instant he mentioned Kurt. Sam was never really a violent person but he looked like he was capable of murder in that moment. Puck wouldn't put it past him if he actually did hurt Kurt but he was pretty certain his main priority was helping Blaine right now, so for the moment, that was also Puck's main priority.

"Look dude, you keep saying that you can't let him go through this alone again, well this is obviously effecting you too so I'm not gonna let _you_ go through it along this time, so come on, let's get in the car. I can't make any promises but we're gonna go do whatever we need to help Blaine." They both climbed back into the car silently with Puck in the driver's seat this time and headed off to help their friend.


	8. Chapter 8

The whole drive to Blaine's house was silent save for Sam giving Puck directions every now and then. Sam had calmed down considerably since they left the school. Puck didn't even want to imagine what was going through his head. He's seen some pretty fucked up shit in his life but he could never imagine walking in on someone in that situation. Not knowing what they're thinking is what he thinks would scare him the most. So instead of thinking about what has already happened, he decided to focus all his attention on what is happening now.

Their sweet, innocent, goofy Blaine is hurting. Puck couldn't think of any other way to see it. Their friend has been hurt and Puck would be damned if he was going to let his idiot best friend get away with doing this to him. He knew there was something Kurt wasn't telling him, there had to be but that didn't mean that he was going to let him off the hook for hurting Blaine, at least till he came clean. Kurt had to mend what he broke. Not that he would need much convincing, Puck thought. He was certain that as soon as Kurt knew how bad things were that he'd start helping in an instant.

Sam spoke up with a "turn left here" and before they knew it they were pulling up out the front of the Anderson house.

They both sat in the car for a couple of minutes in an uncomfortable silence. Neither really wanted to go inside, scared of how they'll find Blaine, but they both new they needed to try and talk to him.

"Okay so here's the plan-"

"This isn't a fucking mission Puck, this is serious. We need to help Blaine, pick up the pieces that Kurt left behind. God I really wanna punch that guy right now."

"And that is why we need a plan, Sam. Otherwise you're gonna get angry and do something you'll regret like you would have today if Schue hadn't walked in. So, we are gonna go inside, find Blaine and find out what happened between him and Kurt and if he refuses to talk then we're going to his parents, okay?"

Sam eyed Puck for a moment, wanting to see how serious he was taking this but all he could see was how much he seemed to care for Blaine, when that happened he had no idea. He knew that now wasn't the time to question that though so instead he nodded and stepped out of the car.

Puck followed behind Sam and together they walked up to the front door. Sam knocked three times and after waiting for a moment the door was answered by a short woman with long black curly hair. She was so obviously Blaine's mother, and she was so obviously really stressed out. Her hair was all over the place and her face looked tired. She looked between the two of them for a moment before her eyes landed on Sam again and suddenly her face lightened up.

"Sam honey, it's so good to see you again." She pulled him into a tight embrace while Puck stood to the side feeling like he was intruding on a private moment between the two. They stayed hugging for a moment too long for it to be deemed a simple friendly hug. It seemed that they must have gotten close after what happened with Blaine.

After they let go, Sam introduced Puck to Blaine's Mum, Susan he reminded himself, who shook hands before they were ushered inside.

"It's really nice to see you again Susan but I was really here looking for Blaine…"

Puck watched Sam as he spoke but saw how he started to trail off after noticing something. Puck followed his line of sight and standing in the doorway to what looked like the living room was a man. Blaine's Dad he guessed.

The air was suddenly awkward and Puck was getting more confused by the minute.

Mr Anderson looked over at Sam and nodded with a simple "Hello Sam." It didn't seem like there was anger there but the tension in the room was definitely rising.

"Mr Anderson." Sam replied with a nod of his own.

"You can call me Anthony."

"With all due respect Sir, I think I'd rather stick with Mr Anderson."

After a beat of silence he ended the short conversation saying "as you wish" and then he was walking back into the room he was previously in and shutting the door.

The boys turned back to Mrs Anderson who smiled sadly at Sam.

"I'm so sorry about him Sam, things haven't been great and he just-"

"It's fine Susan, no need to apologise. You didn't do anything."

"And Noah, I'm sorry you had to meet him that way."

"It's fine Mrs Anderson."

"Please, call me Susan." She said with a smile.

"Only if you call me Puck."

She nodded at him a little confusedly but didn't comment on the name before talking to them both.

"I'm sorry boys but Blaine isn't here. I actually thought he was supposed to be at school now for your glee club? Aren't you supposed to be there too Sam, I was sure he told me you were are part of the club too?" She asked wearily.

"Oh… uh yeah, we finished earlier today. So he's not here?"

Sam and Puck looked at each other with worried expressions before turning back to Susan.

"What's going on boys?"

Sam sighed and the three of them sat down while he went into an explanation of everything starting from how Blaine and Kurt had become so close, to the events of Saturday night, assuring her that Blaine was driven home and didn't drive himself after drinking, up to everything that he had seen and heard that very day.

Puck sat in silence as Sam retold the story watching Susan's reaction. Surprisingly she didn't look shocked about anything but more worried than anything else. Hopefully it was just one of Blaine's bad days and Sam had been overreacting but judging by the tears that started to pool in Susan's eyes, he doubted that was the case.

After Sam had finished retelling everything to Susan, Puck excused himself and went to the bathroom. It seemed like they needed a moment without him there and he had something else he needed to do anyway.

* * *

Kurt was standing under the hood of a broken down minivan that had been brought in the week before. Burt had been sick most of the weekend from not having a drink in a few days so Kurt was left with having to pick up a few hours where he could to help out. This wasn't unusual considering that the last couple of years Burt had been drunk most of the time anyway meaning Kurt would be picking up work where his Dad would be slacking off. He did enjoy it though, being able to worry about something else for a while. Getting his hands dirty has always been therapeutic for him, ever since his Dad taught him how to change a tire. It helps him to forget everything else going on in his life.

He was so lost though that it took a few rings for him to finally realise his phone was ringing. He wiped his hands on the rag hanging out of his back pocket and went over to his phone. Seeing it was Puck he contemplated not answering but knew he'd most likely come looking for him if he didn't answer, so he did.

"What do you want Puck, I'm busy."

"Kurt, you fucked up big time."

"As much as I love to hear that once again I'd be nice to know why you're whispering to the point of me barely being able to hear you."

"I'm in the bathroom."

"Well this just got weird. You do know you have a bedroom right?"

"I'm in Blaine's bathroom you idiot."

Kurt was walking into his Dad's office but ended up hitting his hip on the side of the table when he heard what Puck said.

"You're in Blaine's bathroom?" Kurt asked slowly while sitting down in his Dad's office chair.

"Yeah." Puck answered like it was the most normal thing ever.

"Why the hell are you in Blaine's bathroom?"

"Oh yeah, because you fucked up, that's why."

"I need more information than that."

"Okay, so you know how Sam like totally freaked out on you before? Well turns out Blaine had something really bad happened to him like ages ago and it made him really closed off and not talk to people and play sad music and then something else happened but I don't know if I can tell you because Sam will possibly kill me if I do. I don't even know if he was supposed to tell me. Anyway we came here to find him but he's not here and we tried calling him but we won't answer and he isn't at his friend Jed's place-"

"Do you mean Jeff?"

"Yeah Jeff, whatever. So he's out looking for him but no one can find him."

"Well what do you expect me to do about this? I'm pretty sure I'm the last person he'd wanna talk to right now."

"Well you screwed this all up, so you put it back together. I gotta go, they're gonna think I'm weird for being here for so long. Fix this."

Before Kurt could answer, Puck had already hung up. He slammed his phone down on his Dad's desk, angry with himself about what he'd done. He finally admitted something that had been on his mind all afternoon, something he never thought he'd say. Rachel Berry was right. By trying to protect Blaine he ended up hurting him in the process and although he barely understood anything Puck was trying to say he did understand one thing. This time he really did fuck up.

He never thought that Blaine would react this badly to them fighting. He didn't understand why he would. He had no reason to. Instead of thinking in never ending circles about something he knew he'd never figure out he decided he needed to go find Blaine.

He closed up the shop and walked out to his bike. It wasn't till he got on that he had no idea where to look. He obviously wasn't at any of his friend's houses and he'd already guessed that he wouldn't be at his own after whatever had made him so upset last week. Not knowing where to go he decided to just simply take off and ride through the streets of Lima hoping that maybe Blaine was just driving aimlessly around like he was the night he found Kurt in Lima Heights Adjacent.

After riding for a good hour without any trace of Blaine he pulled over and called Puck back to see if anyone else had found anything. Like he'd guessed, no-one else had seen or heard from him. It wasn't unusual for Blaine to be out this late although most of the time he'd be out this late with Kurt and the guys and he wouldn't be… well he didn't really know what was going on with him right now. Puck was terrible at explaining to him what had happened so all he really knew was that he had to find him, and somehow try and fix things.

He took off and continued to drive around some more. He had no idea how he was going to fix things between them. He knew he wanted to be friends with Blaine, hell he wanted to be way more than just friends but he wouldn't be admitting that anytime soon, but he knew that being so close to Blaine would put him in danger of being seriously hurt by Hugo until Kurt was out of the work anyway. Till then maybe he could convince Blaine that they could be secret friends or something, so that if anything happened between him and Hugo Blaine wouldn't be involved? Okay, well that sounds stupid even thinking about it. He can't keep anything from that man and he knows it.

After riding around without really noticing where he was going, he ended up in the same place he always ends up when riding around without thinking. His and his Mum's clearing in the forest. And right there in front of him is the familiar black Prius.

Of Course. He was an idiot to not even think that Blaine might come here. He told Blaine just less than a week ago that he can come here when he wants to get away from the rest of the world. He thought it was a bit weird for him to come here when he was so obviously pissed off at Kurt but he guessed being in a new town and all, he wouldn't really know many places to go to get away anyway.

He started walking up the path but had no idea what to expect when he actually found the gelled haired boy. Apparently he wasn't talking to anyone so why would he talk to Kurt? Maybe he should just stop here, call Puck and let them all know that he's okay. But there was something stopping him from picking up his phone and doing what he knows he should. Something at the back of his mind that was pushing his legs and keep stepping forward. Before he knew it he was standing in between two trees looking over at the distraught boy lying down in the grass.

He'd always noticed Blaine's obvious good looks but never before had he really taken the time to just look at him. He was lying there with his eyes closed and Kurt couldn't really be sure if he was asleep or not. His hair was always so full of gel it was hard to tell what it would look like naturally. He had such long eyelashes that any girl would be jealous of them. They sit so perfectly against the top of his cheeks and it was almost painful not being able to see the colour of his eyes at the moment. He looks down to his pink lips and absentmindedly traces his own lips remembering what they felt like pressed up against each other. He remembers the perfect fit and longs to have that back. He couldn't believe how far he'd tried to push Blaine that night. He was such an idiot to think that he'd want some fast meaningless quickie in the back of his car. Blaine deserves so much better than him. He deserves a guy that will love and cherish him, not someone that reduces him to tears after one kiss and who pushes him away because it's easier for them both. He deserves everything, something that Kurt can't give him.

He walked over to Blaine and lay down beside him, just like they did the first time they were here together. Kurt didn't say anything to him at first. He didn't know what to say really. What are you supposed to say to someone who has stopped talking to people because of you? Blaine had opened his eyes just for a moment to see who was sitting next to him but promptly closed them and didn't look back at Kurt. _Well he didn't get up and leave so that's a start, right?_

"Maybe it's a good thing you've stopped talking to me, seems like I've been rubbing off on you a bit, I mean you skipped school today and that's not really like you."

_Okay, so maybe not the best start…_

"Apparently some kid came to school drunk today and threw up all over Miss Pillsbury. Fuckin' hilarious."

He looked over at Blaine to look for some sort of reaction. He hadn't even batted an eyelash. You'd think he didn't even know that Kurt was there the way he was acting.

"So you gonna stay here the night? I mean it's safe and all but way too cold at this time of year. You'll freeze to death."

Again, nothing.

"I quit glee club today, stormed out actually. I felt like Rachel fucking Berry when I did that. God I can't stand her, she's so frustrating. They all are. They think they're all saints or something, that they know better than everyone else. Sometimes I just want strangle them all and-"

"Why did you bring me here?"

Blaine's voice was so quiet when he spoke that Kurt wasn't sure whether he really heard him or not. He turned his head to look at him but Blaine was still facing the sky with his eyes closed. He turned his head so he was looking up at the stars in the sky. He still has no idea what possessed him to bring Blaine here last week. He felt some need to show him a safe place and whether that safe place was here in this clearing in the forest or whether he was hoping that he was the safe place he had no idea.

"I uh… I don't really know why. I just felt like I needed to. I can't really explain it I guess."

He knew Blaine was looking for more of an answer but he couldn't give what he didn't have.

"Does anyone else know about this place?"

"…no."

Silence fell upon them and Kurt wanted to hit himself from admitting that to him. This wasn't what he wanted. He needed Blaine away from him, no matter how much it hurt either of them it's what's best, but he couldn't help this pull he felt toward the other boy. As soon as one of them pushes away there is an instant pull reeling them back in whether they like it or not and he was feeling that now more than ever.

"I just… don't understand, Kurt." The way he spoke almost killed Kurt. There was no emotion left. There wasn't even anger or sadness. He sounded empty, like the words he were saying held no meaning but Kurt knew they did. Everything Blaine said or did meant something. It made Kurt hate himself just that little bit more, knowing he was the reason for making him like this, for pushing him over the edge. "You yelled at me saying you don't care but you brought me here to a place that no one else knows about. You told me things about you, about your Mum. And I'm confused because you wouldn't be that open with someone who you were just trying to sleep with. Which means I must've done something, in those few days between to make you hate me so much."

Kurt's head quickly snapped around to look at Blaine. He couldn't possibly think that could he? He had to have known that Kurt didn't hate him. _Doesn't_ hate him. Had he seriously been that horrible to this boy? He really, _really _had fucked it all up this time.

"I could never, ever hate you Blaine." He spoke with so much force in his voice that it surprised even himself. Blaine had to know. Even if they were never friends again Blaine _had _to know that Kurt could never hate him.

"I know I was a complete dick and said things that you didn't deserve to hear but I need you to know that no matter what. I could not hate you."

Blaine finally opened his eyes but he didn't look over at Kurt. It hurt, seeing him close himself off from everyone around him.

Neither of them said anything for a long time. Kurt felt his phone ring in his pocket countless times but he knew answering it would do no good. He'd lie anyway and say he hadn't found Blaine because that's what Blaine wanted right now and he couldn't bring himself to deny anything the boy next to him wanted at the moment.

"Do you believe me, Blaine?"

The question hung in the air for too long a time in Kurt's opinion. He didn't move an inch, not being able to in anticipation of Blaine's answer.

"I don't know what I believe anymore Kurt. But I think I deserve to know why you said all that."

This was the moment Kurt was supposed to make up some amazing lie as to why they couldn't be friends without hurting Blaine in the process. He'd come up with so many in his head on his way here but of course now was the moment he couldn't remember any of that. Now was the moment he decided to be selfish and put his friend's safety on the line. He could tell himself that he didn't want his friend hurting anymore and as true as that is, that isn't why he says what he does.

"Blaine, I'm… I guess you could say I'm in trouble? That doesn't really sound right but I got… mixed up in, something, and now I can't get out of this mess I've made and I'm fucking scared because my boss is really, really powerful and to hurt me, he would hurt the closest people around me, and now that includes you. I guess I was trying to keep you safe but I didn't know how much I hurt you in the process. God I have fucked everything up Blaine."

For the first time since Kurt got there, Blaine turned his head and looked at him and that's when he saw how broken Blaine really looked. His eyes looked glazed over and foggy, like he was looking but wasn't really seeing anything. It scared Kurt seeing him like this and it scared Kurt when he realised how much he trusted Blaine. He trusted him enough to tell him the truth, even if it wasn't the whole truth, but it was still a big deal for him.

"Does this have something to do with the guy you were fighting with that also turned up at Puck's party?"

"Yes."

"And no one knows about any of this?"

"Not really. Puck did but he thinks it's over."

"How am I supposed to trust you now?"

"I don't know. But I really want you too. I kind of need you too."

Blaine just nodded and then turned his head back to face the sky. Kurt didn't know what was in store for them but he knew now that hoping wasn't out of the question anymore. Maybe they could still be friends but Kurt wasn't going to expect it. He wasn't going to expect anything from Blaine anymore.

He felt Blaine slowly slide in hand into his own, fingers weaved in fingers, and for a moment he squeezed but then pulled his hand back to himself. It was brief but it meant so much. It meant that maybe, just maybe. Things could be okay.


	9. Chapter 9

Kurt and Blaine didn't talk for a while. They didn't ignore each other completely but things were definitely different. They smile slightly in greeting as they would pass each other in the hallways at school. Kurt doesn't sit with Blaine in classes anymore but he still sits in front of him in physics, though that's only because there aren't any other seats. Kurt knows he could take any seat he wanted really but he liked being close to Blaine, even if they weren't talking like they used to.

Kurt really did stop going to glee club and Blaine had to admit that he did kind of miss his presence even though he was also thankful for it. Sometimes the boys would all hang out at Finn or Puck's place but Kurt and Blaine never spoke to each other directly, only through larger conversations with other people involved.

Things were never really awkward apart from the one time Blaine was walking out of a classroom and Kurt was walking in and they accidently bumped into each other. Blaine started apologising while Kurt started swearing until they looked up and realised who they had walked into. Blaine blushed and Kurt quietly said sorry. They both walked off without another word.

Kurt never asked Puck what had happened to Blaine at Dalton. He wanted to know, really badly, and he knew he could get it out of Puck no matter how much he swore he wouldn't say anything but he knew it wasn't his place. Blaine hadn't told him for a reason. Blaine obviously didn't trust him anymore and Kurt couldn't blame him. This was what he wanted in the end anyway wasn't it, for Blaine to stay away from him without Blaine hating him? He was safe this way and if Kurt couldn't have everything he wanted then he could at least have this.

When Christmas break rolled around they almost didn't talk at all. Kurt, after deleting and retyping the message about seven times, sent Blaine a text to say Merry Christmas on the twenty fifth where Blaine responded almost instantly. At midnight on New Year's Eve, Blaine sent Kurt a text wishing him a happy new year. Kurt responded instantly.

* * *

Kurt was sitting in a car with Kyle, on their way back from a New Year's party they had both worked at. It was one of the best nights of the year to be selling because it's the of the most popular nights that people want to 'try something new'. Kurt was so sick of it all. The money was good, it always was, but he knew it wasn't worth it, not anymore anyway. Burt had, so far, stayed true to his word and hadn't had a sip of alcohol. He went to the meetings every week and he was becoming closer with Carole. Kurt was glad his Dad had someone else to talk to that wasn't someone he worked with (yes, he did actually go to work regularly now)but it was also a bit weird coming home to find his friend's Mum in his kitchen helping his Dad cook dinner.

They had worked through the night and into the morning so Kurt was able to watch the sky change colours while they drove through Lima. He found himself thinking about Blaine like he so often did these days. He worried about him. He wanted to know how Blaine was, wanted to make sure he was smiling and not cutting himself off from the rest of the world. It's absolutely killing Kurt not seeing Blaine and he can't wait until the holidays are over just so he can see him. He knows they won't talk but all he needs is to see him smile, just once, to know he's better.

Kyle pulls up to an old large house that's situated on the outskirts of Lima. Hugo's house. Kurt has always hated this place. It's like walking into a horror movie. It's always too quiet in there and the dull colours make the house even spookier at night time. Now with the morning sun streaming through the windows, dust can be seen floating through the air despite how clean the house always is. They walk through the cold house, up the stairs and into a living room where Hugo was talking with Ivan, his so called 'business partner'. Really he just handled all the dirty work, the things that Hugo didn't have the guts to do himself and the things that Kurt really didn't want to know about.

As Kurt and Kyle walked closer to the closed door the floor creaked underneath them and the other men stopped talking. Hugo opened the door and with one look at Ivan, he left, leaving Hugo Kurt and Kyle alone.

"Boys, sit please."

They sat on the couch as they watched Hugo pour himself a glass of whiskey despite the early hour.

"Money." He ordered with his hand reaching out to Kyle who handed him an envelope full of cash they had made that night.

They sat in silence as Hugo counted everything and then gave the boys their cuts for the night.

"So, Kurt. You say you want out?"

Kurt's eyes shot up at Hugo from where they had been previously counting what he had made himself that night. He was surprised that the issue was being addressed at all knowing that Hugo didn't want to let him go at all.

"Fine. I have one last job. You deliver this bag to this address and then our work together is done." With that he got up and handed Kurt the duffel bag that had been sitting on the armchair next to Hugo as well as a slip of paper with an address on it.

"Y-you're sure? I mean that's it, deliver this and I'm done?" Kurt knew he must have heard wrong, what Hugo wants Hugo gets, and he wanted Kurt.

"Well unless you'd rather stay?"

"NO! I-I mean, no thanks. Uhm I'll just go now then if that's all? Are they wanting me to deliver anything back to you or…?"

"No. Do this and you're done. The bag's heavy so take Kyle's car and then come back and get your motorcycle off my property."

Kurt couldn't get out of there any faster. He grabbed the bag, address and Kyle's keys and raced downstairs and out the door. He got into the car and started it up. He put the address into the GPS and drove off. It wasn't until he was halfway there he pulled the car over and let himself breathe. He had no reason to trust that it was all over for him so easily when Hugo had threatened him so many times for trying to leave and now he was just letting him go? It didn't make sense. He pulled the car out and continued driving again, trying not to think too much about what had just happened.

When he reached the right street he parked a few doors down and walked up to the house with the bag over his shoulder. He reached the house and knocked on the door a few times hoping that someone was home and awake. It was nine thirty in the morning on New Year's Day after all.

He heard someone walking around inside and as the door opened he took a step back as he saw who was on the other side of the door.

"Karofsky? You've gotta be fucking kidding me."

Karofsky looked just as confused as Kurt felt though it looked like he was just waking up.

"Hummel?" He asked through a yawn. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Fuck, I must have the wrong house or-"

"Dave! I told you not to answer the door you idiot. Move."

Some guy, a little taller than Karofsky but just as bulky came storming through the house and right up to Kurt. He could tell that the guy must have been Karofsky's brother or something because they looked so alike, this guys was just a little older.

"Screw you Danny." Dave said as he stood back from the door.

"You the guy Hugo sent?"

"Uh yeah." Kurt said as he lifted the bag off his shoulder and handed it over to the guy, Danny.

Danny opened the bag as soon as he grabbed it and started looking through it, obviously making sure everything was there. He seemed satisfied and left mumbling nothing but a quick thanks to Kurt who was then left alone with Karofsky.

"Uh look, Kurt, about what happened-"

"Don't. Whatever it is I don't want to hear it. I have better things to be doing than standing here talking to you."

"Fine," Karofsky scoffed. "Whatever." Then slammed the door in Kurt's face.

Kurt walked down the street to the car, angry that one of the first people he had to see this year was Karofsky when it should have been his Dad or Puck or even Blaine. He got into the car and sped off to Hugo's house to collect his bike and hopefully never to have to return again.

* * *

It was midday when Blaine woke up on the floor of Nick's lounge room. Every New Year's Eve Wes, David, Blaine, Thad, Nick and Jeff would get together at Nick's house, whose parents always spent that night in Chicago with friends, to have a little celebration of their own. Wes' older brother, Michael, turned twenty one a few months ago and was able to buy them alcohol this year. So while the other boys would be getting drunk, Blaine would be sipping on his soda instead. He knew how the alcohol could affect him and with everything that had happened lately he didn't want to risk anything and just wanted to have some fun.

Since the night he talked to Kurt in the clearing he started going to therapy again. His Mum had suggested it to him a few days later and he reluctantly agreed knowing that he wasn't going to be seeing Dr Kinswell in Westerville. She had suggested a few other therapists to Blaine that were closer to Lima and that's how he found himself going to see Dr Munroe once a week. Blaine feels like he's doing better now than he was before. He's able to talk to his friends at school though he might not always feel entirely comfortable around them. He misses having Kurt around but he always feels better when Sam is by his side. Things aren't too awkward with Kurt, and Blaine had started to forgive him, but he wasn't really ready for them to become friends again. He still hasn't talked to his Dad and he's starting to wonder if they'll ever really talk again. That's why he was so excited for New Year's Eve because he always felt safe around these guys. He knew they would never judge him.

He sat up and looked around at his friends who were still asleep in various positions around the room. Knowing they wouldn't be awake for another few hours he decided to go and take a shower. He walked upstairs quietly, sure not to wake up any of the other guys, and made his way to Nick's room to grab his bag. He checked his phone and found a message from Puck asking how he was.

Puck had become really protective of Blaine ever since his fight with Kurt and although he really didn't understand why, seeing as they were never all that close, he quickly got used to it. Sam had told Blaine that he'd mentioned what happened at Dalton when Blaine first moved there to Puck and maybe that was why he was acting this way? Blaine really didn't know but after getting daily messages from him while they were on Christmas break he stopped questioning it.

As he stood in the shower he couldn't help but feel a little disappointed every time he checked his phone when he got a message or a phone call only to find that it wasn't Kurt and he found himself wishing that it was Kurt messaging him every day making sure he was alright instead of Puck. He knew it was selfish and even a little stupid considering everything that had happened between them but he really was trying to believe Kurt when he said he'd told Blaine he didn't mean anything he'd said at Puck's party.

Was it really so bad if he missed Kurt? Blaine knew he had Jeff and he had always been such a good friend and helped Blaine through some really tough times but Kurt understood him in a way he wasn't sure anyone else ever really would. He could read Blaine as if Blaine was telling him everything himself and though that scared him he also found himself relieved at times. Admittedly Kurt had crossed some lines when they first met but Kurt had apologised and ever since has always been so gentle and has always been there for him. And maybe there was a part of him that wanted to know what would have happened if they'd kissed at Puck's but what does that matter now? Even if they were to start talking at school again it's not like they would get together anyway. They wanted different things. Kurt just wanted someone to have sex with, and Blaine? Well he'd always just wanted someone to love who loved him back. Was that really so much to ask for?

As Blaine stepped out of the shower and into the steam filled room, he promised himself that he'd stop actively avoiding Kurt when they got back to school and would see what would happen from there but for now he was going to try and enjoy the rest of his break without thinking about Kurt. It wasn't a surprise that he didn't last ten minutes without thinking of the other boy.

* * *

When Blaine stepped out of his car into the school parking lot he was reminded of his first day at McKinley. He was nervous, possibly even more so than his first day but not for the same reason. He was nervous about seeing Kurt again but it was a mixture of being excited and worried about seeing him. He'd promised himself that he would stop trying to avoid Kurt but what if he talked to him and Kurt didn't want anything to do with him? Blaine knew he had to stop thinking like this. He hated thinking the worst of Kurt but lately he didn't have much to believe in.

He walked into the school and made his way over to his locker when he spotted Kurt for the first time. He leant against his locker as Kurt and Puck were play fighting with each other like they so often did. Blaine couldn't hear what they were saying but he was surprised by what he saw. Kurt was happy. Blaine wasn't naïve enough to think that Kurt would be miserably pining over Blaine or anything but the way he was laughing and smiling and looked so carefree had Blaine's stomach twisting in knots. He loved seeing Kurt happy like this, he hadn't seen him this way in such a long time he could barely even remember when it was. It put a smile on his own face without him even realising it. On the other hand though, he couldn't help but feel a little jealous that it wasn't him that Kurt was laughing with. It wasn't him that was putting that smile on Kurt's face. His mind was brought back to the picture he found in the garage of Kurt and his family. Blaine had promised himself that he would make Kurt smile like that again someday and he couldn't help but feel like he'd somehow let Kurt down.

He grabbed his books out of his locker and turned around just as Puck spotted him and waved him over. He started walking over to the pair and watched as Kurt's smile faltered a little and he began to hate himself just that little bit more knowing it was him who caused that to happen.

"Anderson!" Puck practically yelled as he threw his arm around Blaine's shoulders. "What's up man? We missed you."

"Ah, hey, Puck." Blaine was suddenly standing right in front of Kurt with Puck still talking in his ear about how much he missed him over the break or something. Blaine didn't really care about that. All he could care about were the blue orbs so completely focused on him and the arm around his shoulders.

He knew they'd have to speak at some point and they had class next anyway so it was now or never, right?

"Hey, Kurt." Blaine spoke so quietly he was barely heard over Puck's rambling.

"Hi Blaine." Kurt replied just as quietly.

They stood there and just stared at each other for what felt like hours but what could have only been a few moments. At some point Puck must have realised what was going on and had decided to walk away and leave the two of them alone.

"So…"

The silence stretched out even longer until they both laughed awkwardly at themselves.

Blaine was thankful when Kurt tried again.

"So, good break?"

"Uh yeah, it was okay I guess. It was good to get a break from school I-"

"You mean a break from me?" Kurt asked. He didn't really look angry, just curious, maybe a little upset though.

"Kurt-"

"Blaine it's fine. I get it. I was a complete dick and you deserve to have better people in your life. People that will make you happier than they will sad." Kurt looked at him with such sadness in his eyes. Blaine had tried so hard to believe that Kurt had been trying to protect him from whatever he was mixed up in but it wasn't until this very moment that he saw this was all hurting Kurt too, maybe just as much as it was hurting Blaine. It wasn't until this moment that he truly believed that Kurt really did care about him.

"That's not true. Yeah you hurt me but you did make me happy, Kurt, happier than anyone else here ever really has."

Blaine couldn't stop the smile that graced his face when he looked up at Kurt. There was so much hope in his eyes and it made him so happy to think that Kurt was hopeful for them. That maybe they can do this, still be friends even with everything that had happened.

"So does this mean you'll start sitting with me in class again? Because English is so boring without you to annoy anymore."

Blaine laughed. A real, true laugh that hasn't felt forced in any way since before Puck's party and he liked how it made him feel. If someone was to ask him yesterday if he was happy his answer would have been a straight up no, but now, here with Kurt again, if someone was to ask the same question he wouldn't be sure that he'd be able to say yes, but he would answer with one day, maybe even one day soon.

They started walking to class together in a comfortable silence when Kurt suddenly stopped just outside the empty classroom. Blaine turned around to see Kurt looking at him with such vulnerability in his eyes, even more so than the time he apologised for the disastrous kiss they shared.

"Kurt? What's wrong-"

"I'm so sorry Blaine." The blue eyed boy rushed out. "I didn't want to hurt you and I didn't think things would go as far as they did but then you were so upset and I didn't want to believe it was me that did that but everyone was telling me it was my fault, Sam almost killed me because of it and it wasn't even worth it because I hurt you because I couldn't get out of dealing but then he just let me go for no reason and I lost you for it when I didn't even need to and… I just… I'm just so sorry Blaine."

"Hey Kurt, slow down. First of all, yeah you hurt me but it wasn't all you. I was already upset with you but then there were other… things that pushed me over the edge after that. It wasn't all you, Kurt. I need you to know that. Second of all," Blaine took a breath before he asked his next question. "What did you mean when you said dealing?"

Kurt's head shot up from where his eyes were trained on the floor and he looked like a deer caught in headlights.

"Fuck. I, uhm, yes. Yeah I was dealing Blaine. I was drug dealing, that's what I w-was caught up in. I couldn't get out and my boss threatened to hurt people around me and that's why… it's why I…"

Kurt kept shaking his head at himself and was looking around himself like he was looking for an escape route. It made sense though. If this was true, which seeing how nervous the subject made Kurt had Blaine believe it was the truth, then everything made just a little more sense in Blaine's eyes. Why Kurt had to 'protect' him. Who that guy he kept seeing with Kurt was and why he was always disappearing in the middle of the day.

Blaine knew they had so much more to talk about but he knew right now wasn't the time for that.

"Class is going to start soon. Why don't we sit down so you can, oh I don't know, start planning all the ways you want to annoy me this lesson for your own entertainment."

Kurt looked up and Blaine gave him a reassuring smile. Who he was trying to reassure he didn't know but he didn't think about it.

"We can talk later."


End file.
